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“Then tell him. Either he’ll understand, or he won’t. But at least you’ll have your answer.”
But if he doesn’t understand, will I lose him before I ever get the chance to have him?
Cade spent the drive to the doctor’s office the next morning trying to make me smile. He sensed my discomfort as soon as he picked me up and incorrectly assumed it was because I was worried about the appointment. That was part of it, but my blood pressure hasn’t changed in the past two weeks, so I’m fairly certain that everything is going to be okay today with baby girl Kingston. What I still haven’t decided is what I’m going to do with her daddy.
As we now sit in the cold office, waiting for Dr. Esher to do the exam, my heart speeds up at the touch of Cade’s hand on the back of my neck while I lean back on the table.
“Everything is going to be alright, Scarlet.” He leans in and places a chaste kiss on my lips. “I won’t let anything happen to you or our girl.”
I lean my head against his, whispering against his lips, “You called her a girl.”
“I did. I’m pretty sure you can will anything you want into existence, duchess. God himself better move out of the way for Scarlet Kingston.” He kisses my forehead as Dr. Esher walks through the door.
“How are we feeling this week, Scarlet? Any better?” She starts scrolling through her questions, as she reads through my chart. “Your blood pressure is still higher than I’d like it to be, but it’s holding steady, not going up. You don’t have any protein spilling into your urine. So we’ll continue to monitor it. I’m not ready to put you on anything for it yet, but we may need to if anything changes.”
She goes over things to look for and says I’m going to have to come back in for a blood pressure check again in two weeks but we won’t need to do a full exam then. “Alright, shall we have a little look?”
I unbutton the bottom of my soft pink button-down shirt and pull down the waistband of my black leggings. I’m pregnant, but I haven’t popped yet. My waist is thicker, and my breasts are bigger, but I just look like I’ve gained a little weight. I’m trying to find a balance between comfort and class while I try to still look cute.
I’m just not sure how much longer that will last.
The cold jelly is squeezed onto my bloated belly, and the doctor starts rolling the doppler back and forth around my abdomen. “Now we’ll need you to schedule the anatomy scan for some time over the next week or so. They’ll check out all the baby’s organs and systems. They can usually tell you the gender too.” She moves the doppler a little more, catching the speedy little thumping of our baby’s heartbeat.
“Oh, wow. Well, if it’s something you want to know, it looks like I can tell you the sex of the baby now. I seem to be getting flashed.” She taps a few buttons on the screen, then angles it to us.
I have no idea what she was looking at.
All I see are two perfect pouty lips, that appear to be sucking on a finger.
Cade leans down and kisses the top of my head. “Your call. Do you want to know?”
I smile up at him. “I think I do.” I turn back to Dr. Esher. “Can you really tell us? I mean, how accurate is it?”
“Let’s just say I have no doubt, Scarlet. But it’s completely up to you.”
Cade squeezes the back of my neck again, and I soak in his strength.
“Okay.” I reach up and grab Cade’s other hand. “We want to know.”
She points to a grey blob on the screen. “Your little girl isn’t very shy, and she is most definitely a girl.”
“Our little girl.” My heart feels more full than I ever knew was possible as I stare at my little daughter on the screen and make her a million promises all at once. She will never have the life I’ve lived. She’ll never doubt that her mother loves her. I didn’t think it was possible, but my world has shifted yet again, and she’s the new constant it’s going to rotate around.
Suddenly, nothing else seems quite so important.
Just her.
I gasp and turn to Cade. His forest-green eyes are filled with emotion.
He wraps his arm around my shoulders, and whispers in my ear, “You were right, duchess.” His voice betrays his emotions. “We’re having a girl.” His lips press against my temple, and I wish I could freeze this moment in time.
One perfect moment amidst the chaos yet to come.
A girl.
Our girl.
