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‘Whether he’s caught wind of my ex-lover’s arrival and believes I’m distracted?’ His lips firmed. ‘Probably. Spies don’t just exist in movies and novels.’
‘But you don’t know for sure?’
‘Leave me to handle my cousin. But be assured that neither he nor your brother will interrupt the remainder of our twenty-four hours,’ he clipped out.
Frantically, she tore her gaze from him, feigning interest in the beauty and magic of the place so he wouldn’t see how affected she was by the reminder of their limited time.
But then she forced herself to be realistic. It would take more than half a day to erase what had happened twelve years ago, especially when she hadn’t come fully clean.
Biting her lip, she concentrated more on her surroundings, letting them wash over her. ‘It’s beautiful and peaceful here,’ she murmured, tactfully changing the subject.
A throb of silence passed, during which his gaze remained fixed on her, before he replied. ‘It wasn’t always.’
Her heart thudded heavily in her chest. ‘Because of your banishment?’
‘Yes.’
Lauren decided to forge ahead to the subject that weighed heavier on her mind and heart with each passing minute. ‘I hate that I contributed to turning something you loved into an unpleasant memory for you.’
He looked around him for several seconds before he answered. ‘It was a good lesson in not taking things for granted or at face value.’
That stung far more than the pragmatism in his response should’ve elicited. ‘Maybe. But did you really need another reminder? And did that reminder have to be this one?’
‘We can’t change the past, Lauren,’ he said with a finality that shook her to her very bones.
‘No, but you can consider forgiving it,’ she murmured.
His nostrils pinched but he continued to regard her like a specimen under a microscope. ‘Convince me that there’s more than one reason for you being here. Do that, and I’ll consider it,’ he countered smoothly, one contemplative finger trailing the lip of his coffee cup. But underneath it, there was fierce tension that jangled her nerves.
What he was asking of her...
She’d bared so much of herself and been hurt in the process by the family that should’ve loved her.
But wasn’t she tired? Wasn’t enough quite enough?
Lauren dragged her gaze from the sensual motion of his finger and sucked in a breath. This time, she wasn’t frantic at the relentless passage of time. Because while her first reaction was to saynoto this question, deep inside, another response burned within her.
Of course, he gleaned that with his next words. ‘You won’t be betraying him by admitting Matt is long overdue a few life lessons. And you’re equally overdue a little reconditioning of your own.’
She played it cool, arching a lazy eyebrow. ‘Such as?’
‘You throttle your ambition and desires for a family that doesn’t appreciate you. At the risk of repeating myself, you’re wasted on them. Your talent, your passion.’ His burnished gaze raked her face, lingering on her mouth. ‘Your beauty.’ The thick, peculiar note in his voice burrowed deep inside her, warmed her where she’d grown used to being so cold it’d become a part of her.
But the thawing was painful, the admission that change was needed lodging a huge lump in her throat. ‘You can’t change your family. You know that as well as I do. What would you have me do?’ she tossed back, not quite ready to confront the solution that shrieked in her head.
He regarded her steadily with far too much circumspection in his gaze. ‘You know, Lauren,’ he delivered without pomp or gloating. ‘You’ve always known. You were abandoned by your mother so you’re afraid you’ll be abandoned again.’
She gasped. ‘You know I was adopted?’
Tawny eyes met hers and she saw neither judgement nor rejection. ‘Yes. Matt told me years ago,’ he replied, then, before she could absorb that news, he was moving on. As if it was no big deal. ‘You’re strong. Don’t subdue your own strength just to make them feel stronger. Step out from the shadows. Remind yourself how it feels to bask in the light. How it feels to let go and just...feel.’
It spoke volumes of her need that she was immediately thrown back to their time at his oasis when she’d vowed she wasn’t going to think about the pleasure he’d given her at the springs. Not just physical pleasure but a connection she hadn’t felt in years.
Dear God, she wanted a repeat performance. Wanted reprieve—and not just a temporary one, her heart insisted—from those shadows he spoke of.
She pushed away the lingering guilt over Matt.
She would never be in this place again, would probably never share space with Tahir, so why not let the time unfold without the angst and tension? Why not come clean with everything and let the chips fall where they might? Drawing a deep breath, she looked him in the eyes. ‘Those shadows you talked about...some of them were because of you.’
