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He kissed me, gripped my hips and thrust hard and deep. My orgasm rocketed through me, and I felt myself biting down on something, I think it was Eli’s shoulder. He didn’t seem to care as he fell against me, panting against my neck.
“Too much,” he said. “No, I take it back, that was perfect.”
“I bet we can top it,” I said, lying bonelessly underneath him.
He laughed weakly and rolled to the side, pulling me close. “Give me a minute, and I’ll take that bet.”
After he brought me to ecstasy two more times, he drifted off to sleep. I tried to, but despite being exhausted from the long day and the multiple workouts we gave each other, I stayed wide awake.
Thinking. Stressing.
I covered him with the sheet and watched him for a while, his arm around me, just enjoying his chest rising and falling with each breath. I could get used to that. Except, I knew I couldn’t. I had such a good time working on that project the last few days, it really opened my eyes to the fact that I definitely want to keep moving forward in publishing. I craved more responsibilities and being able to give creative input. It was all thanks to Eli that I’d had those opportunities in the first place, but if I wanted to advance my career, or even just keep my job with him, we had to keep things professional.
Lying in his arms, I didn’t know if that was possible. Tears stung my eyes as I slipped out of bed and got dressed. I found a piece of paper and wrote him a note saying that if I was going to keep working for him, this couldn’t happen again. I snuck out like a coward and got a taxi home, wondering if I wanted him to fire me as a way of fighting for our relationship. Should I grow a spine and quit? That seemed most honest.
I was greedy. I wanted it all, the job and Eli. I fell asleep near dawn with the terrible feeling I’d end up losing everything.
Chapter 23 - Eli
I was more upset than pissed off when I found out she’d left in the middle of the night. So this is what it felt like to be on that end? It didn’t feel good. In fact, it sucked. I didn’t go into the office until it was time to make our presentation, not sure I could see her without raging. Or breaking down and begging. Once again I was back to just being grateful she was at her desk when I showed up with only a few minutes for us to gather up our designs and head to the conference room on the art department floor.
The elevator ride was silent, and not a comfortable silence. She practically huddled in the corner away from me, clutching her laptop to her chest. At least she was wearing summer appropriate clothing again. Even the hint of cleavage at the top of her blouse didn’t lift my spirits.
I watched as she set up the laptop and put a copy of our proposal at each seat, then we waited in more silence for Paige and her head director to come in and sit down.
“Whenever you’re ready, Eli,” she said.
I had practically bullied her into letting us do this. She was a great art director but the magazine had been doing fine and she wanted to stay the course. She thought the outline of my original plan was needlessly rocking the boat, so I was hoping she kept an open mind. Even though I had promised Violet that Paige had the final say and there would be no favoritism, I was fully prepared to override Paige’s judgment if she decided against our proposal. Violet had worked too hard and poured so much of her heart into the project I refused to let it die.
“I’d like Violet to take over,” I said. She gasped and when I turned to look at her, she was twisting her fingers together. I shook my head slightly and she stopped. “You’ve got this,” I said quietly.
She got up and cleared her throat, anxiously flipping the presentation on. After a moment, she found her stride and her confidence kicked in. She knew the material backwards and forwards, since most of the ideas were hers. By the end of the presentation, Paige and her directors were mesmerized. Just like I was, but for a different reason. My heart hurt. I loved her so much, and I was so proud of her, I applauded when she finished. Her cheeks turned red, and she scowled at me before breaking out in a grin.
She fielded their questions, and we hashed out their few concerns, working in their suggestions to streamline a few things. There wouldn’t be a need for me to secretly greenlight the project because Paige was all in. After they left us alone in the conference room, Violet sat down, breathing out a long sigh.
“You did great,” I said.
She nodded wordlessly, and I saw a few tears streaking down her cheeks. She saw that I noticed them and swiped them away.
“Happy tears?” I asked hopefully.
“I don’t even know, Eli,” she said.
I wanted to punch through the wall. This should have been one of the happiest moments in her life. I couldn’t touch her to congratulate or console her. The fact that all I wanted was for her to be happy, and I somehow made her miserable was more than I could handle. I stalked out, leaving her to clean up the presentation. She was my assistant, after all. Nothing more. That was what she wanted.
I wasn’t in my office very long when she tapped at the door. I ignored it, not needing anything. We didn’t have a meeting until after lunch so there was no reason for her to come in. She did anyway.
“I’m sorry,” she said in a small voice.
“What are you sorry for?” I asked, perplexed.
“For sneaking out, for that dumb note. I wish—Are you okay?”
What did she wish? It infuriated me that she wouldn’t tell me so I could make it happen. She was going to kill me, slowly, by ripping my heart out in little pieces. I slammed my hands on my desk and stood up. “No, I’m not okay. I don’t want you working for me anymore.”
She sucked in a breath and backed up a step, her eyes wide. I hurried to clarify what I meant. “I think you’d do great in the art department. Paige would be lucky to have you after today. I’ll have HR send your resumé to her if you want.”
“Is that what you want?” she asked.
