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“What are you doing here?” He looks over my head. “What is she doing here?”
Danielle clears her throat sheepishly. “I’m sorry, Alpha. I couldn’t refuse the Luna Sovereign.”
Dominic shakes his head, his nose wrinkling with obvious annoyance. “You shouldn’t be here, Tasha. You don’t need to see him like this. Let Al patch him up, and then if you really need to talk, you can see him. He’s not in any shape for an argument.”
“Argument?” I echo. “I’m not here to argue with anyone. I’ll save that for later, but I’m going to see my matenow, Dominic. And that is not a request. That’s an order.”
I stare him down, refusing to back down as his face hardens. He’s the one who relents after a tense moment. It doesn’t matter how big his pack is, I exist higher than him on the hierarchy as the Luna Sovereign. His mouth sets in a grim line, and he nods once as he releases my shoulders.
“This way.” He jerks his head toward the pack house.
“Where’s Alpha Waverly?” My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest. I don’t want to be in her presence, but it’s alarming that she wouldn’t be here at all. I knew there was something off with her, and I should have listened to my gut sooner.
“Your guess is as good as mine.” Dominic lets out a low growl that I don’t understand.
“What do you mean, she isn’t here? Where else would she be?” The Sovereign Pack exists solely for the protection and support of the Luna Sovereign. Why would she leave without saying anything? I have a feeling in my gut that the answer to that question might also tell me why she left the Sovereign House with no protection.
Dominic shakes his head. He really doesn’t have an answer for this either, which only increases the tension twisting my stomach in knots. A feeling that multiplies tenfold when we step through the doors of the pack house.
I can feel the blood drain from my face as I shove past to Dominic to get to Paxton. He’s motionless on the beige sofa in the front room, his eyes only opening when I reach his side.
“Shit.” He squints up at me, barely able to hold his eyes open. He says something else, but it comes out as gibberish. I can’t understand what he’s trying to say, but I see him twitch his fingers like he’s trying to move his hand but can’t. I take it in mine and squeeze harder than I probably should.
“What did you give him?” I ask, my tone accusatory as I glare at Dominic hovering behind me.
“Luca made him a cocktail of natural painkillers that was stronger than intended. He’ll be fine once he sleeps it off. Honestly, it’s probably for the best that he’s not awake for the next part either. Before we dosed him, he said you shouldn’t see him like this. Otherwise, I would have had someone bring you immediately.” Dominic swipes his hand across his forehead. “We should have been backing him up better. If I had realized—“
“I don’t want to hear this right now,” I interrupt.
There will be plenty of time to place blame later. I can see blood seeping out onto the sofa from somewhere near his hip. I look past Dominic to Al with a pleading look.
“We’ll get him patched right up.” Al moves to my side and squeezes my shoulder reassuringly. “We’ll need to turn him on his side to give me access. You said the marks on his back are worse than the flank wound, correct?”
His back?My wolf whimpers. He really was ambushed, and the need to know who the hell hurt him fills me. Now isn’t the right time to ask, though. I let go of Paxton’s hand long enough to walk around to the back of the couch to give them room to move him as they see fit. Then I take his hand again and squeeze tight like before. Based on the way he’s mumbling to himself, I’m not sure he knows I’m here, but I keep squeezing to try to remind him anyway.
I’m here, I say over mind link.
He doesn’t respond, and it makes my heart sink. He has to be okay. There’s no way I’ll survive losing a second mate. The fates can’t be so cruel as to send him to me only to take him away.
They turn Paxton on his side, and I get a look at what Al is talking about. There are deep gashes on his back in the distinct shape of claw marks. My stomach turns sour. I squeeze my eyes shut to keep myself from looking as Al examines the wounds.
I speak over mind link because I need to ramble to do something to release all my nervous energy, but I don’t want to distract the doctor while he works.
Jimmy and I used to talk about what would happen in the event I outlived him. Betas are constantly in danger, even in packs like the East Terrace Green Pack that don’t get involved in conflict very often. I always swore I would stay in our home and never leave. If I hadn’t been chasing my sister after she ran away, maybe I wouldn’t have.
I resented the Sovereign Pack for taking me away from my sister. Even in the midst of my own loss, I felt like it was my job to make sure she was taken care of. Isn’t it funny how she’s the one taking care of me now?
But even though the Sovereign Pack didn’t particularly seem to care for me, I felt comfortable among them. They gave me a purpose that didn’t feel like a betrayal of my mate. Jimmy always swore I should take another mate if he died, even if it meant bringing the new mate into the home we had shared together. Of course, he wasn’t exactly picturing someone like you.
We always imagined that if it did happen—Goddess forbid—that we would have already had kids and more time. He thought I should marry a widower and blend families. He knew I wanted a big family, and if he couldn’t give it to me for any reason, he still wanted me to have it.
That’s why it’s so maddening for me that it’s so hard it is for you to bond with your family. Maybe if you could just be happy to have them, it wouldn’t feel like you’re asking me to give up so much. Even if you don’t want pups. Even if that never happens for us… I would still have the big family that Jimmy always knew I wanted.
When you survive this—because you have to survive this—maybe you could try for me? And I don’t mean showing up and hoping that’s enough. I want you to try really seeing all the reasons there are to love your family. Because there are, Paxton. Every one of your siblings has a story and a journey worth knowing. I know you all drew a bad card with Greg, but the others aren’t him.
You don’t have to look at your siblings and see your parents, Paxton. I don’t look at Tevin or Tess and see mine.
“Are you okay?” Luca gently lays a hand on my shoulder. I feel absolutely wrecked inside, tears streaming over my cheeks. Luca hands me a tissue as I struggle to fill my lungs with air in between silent sobs.
