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My lashes flutter shut at the familiar taste of mint leaves and coffee on his breath. I kiss him back with more passion than in years.
His smile is small against my lips, bringing both of his arms to wrap around me and hold me to him.
I clutch onto his shirt, hands into fists, and fight off the tears that threaten to spill from my clenched eyes.
My struggle is useless.
Finally, when Daein abandons my lips to draw back a little and look down at me, I feel the dampness on my cheeks. His smile still dances in place as he slips an arm away from me before reaching up to wipe away my tears.
“It is only one week,” he tells me. “I feel it, too, evate,” he adds in a low whisper. “But this will be good for you—and you can always return home early if you choose.”
I know what he means by saying this will be good for me. He doesn’t really meanme. He hopes that this little trip to the light lands will make for a happier wife if only for a little while, a reprieve in my sad soul between now and the time that our second child comes. And then he wishes that the second child will take away all of my sorrow.
It will help, I can’t lie. It will heal me to have this child to myself, raise it the way I choose to, love it and have its love in return. But it’s so much more than that. Ineedso much more than that to heal the wounds my life has inflicted on me.
Leaning up on the toes of my leather boots, I plant a tender kiss on his lips, our gazes locked. And then I pull away, letting my hands slip down his chest until they fall at my sides, limp.
“I love you,” I tell him—and it isn’t a total lie. I do love him, I suppose … in my own way.
Daein blinks, stunned for a moment, before a perfectly shaped eyebrow lifts and he studies me.
“And I’ll miss you,” I add with a weak, watery smile.
He lifts his hand to my cheek. His touch is warm and I ache to lean into it. “One week, my wife. And then you will be home where you belong.”
I nod, the smile fading into something of a whisper, and start to back up to the carriage. Towards freedom.
No one senses my escape is pending. No one makes to stop me.
And it’s all so different from the last time I tried to flee.
Now, I havetrust.
I betray the trust and climb into the carriage. Before I’ve sat myself down comfortably, the door is closed quietly behind me, and I look out between the parted curtains.
Daein stands firm in the courtyard, not moving an inch, as the reins are whipped and those ghastly skeletal steeds start to hit their hooves on the stone.
My husband watches as the carriage leaves. And as we make our way down the windy bridge, I twist around to look out of the rear window, and I can barely make him out anymore, but I do see his shape still standing there.
He watches until I can’t see a trace of him anymore.
I sink back into the seat, facing the empty space opposite me.
And with the guards just above me on the carriage, I’m careful to muffle my sobs into a velvet cushion.
Yet, I don’t go back. I don’t turn around and rush back into the familiar and safe arms of my husband.
I say nothing, I let the carriage ride, and I suffer the long journey to the light lands, not knowing what this escape will mean for me. But I suspect I know what it means for the guards on top of the carriage.
Certain death.
Am I to meet the same fate in a twisted trap of deceit?
No, the litalves can’t lie. I must trust what Rain told me in the letter.
I will soon learn the truth. The truth of everything.
