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Somehow, I am the one left standing even though I don’t deserve it.
***
I look in the mirror, and the first thing I notice is I have circles under my eyes. Have I been sleeping much? I don’t know. I am not exactly on a schedule anymore. I have been here for I think a little more than a week now, and I can hear Rhys through the door, asking about me.
Yeah, he has to ask other people how his wife is doing. We aren’t exactly talking right now. I am sure the blame is on both of us, but I feel betrayed. I am under lock and key in a New York hotel room while he gets to leave and deal with Clan business.
I am kept in the dark. I have no information, no freedom, and no purpose. And I hate everyone here. Everyone has wronged me. They can’t cage a wild animal like me. I will die.
I feel dead.
I pull out my trusty knife and lift a tuft of hair, turning to the side so I can see the back of my neck in the mirror. I reach back and make a clean slice, joining a few others there. It has become a daily ritual, the only thing I still feel and the scars that define me inside are now on the outside. I don’t know what Rhys will say if he ever sees them, but then again, why should I care?
