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Chapter 21
Presley
I look out my office’s large windows, a corner office that is fit for the CEO of the company even though I have gone silent in the eyes of the company. I run it in the background, taking on menial office tasks while I let my brother, Nathan take a salary and the brunt of the public eye when it comes to this company. It was the only way to appease my parents and make this livable considering I am now back in the same state as them. Even being in the same country is hard, and I think it will probably stay that way for a long time.
The tabloids had a field day when the photos of my father leaked, but they were leaked on purpose by myself and my brother for a high price tag that I then took and put back into the business, though some of it went to a charity meant to rehome children displaced when they came out to their parents. At least Nathan has let me keep a few of my previous causes, though he often twists it to make our father look better than he should in all of this. My mother has threatened divorce many times, but they still technically live together for the sake of keeping up appearances; go figure.
Life is strange now. I unenrolled entirely from college when I came back, and there were plenty of fights with my father. But mostly I was embarrassed and angry about what went down in Brazil with my husband – a man who is still legally my husband. My father keeps telling me to file, but I figure I’ll let him eventually claim abandonment of the marriage or whatever. I just don’t want to have to face him again when I still don’t understand everything that happened.
I know what he did was bad, but my life is a mess here back in the states. It is too ordinary, and I am just scraping by with a routine that my heart is not in.
I will never admit to a single soul, other than the only one left I trust, that there was any point that my heart was in it with Stefan, but it was. Part of me worries it still is and always will be. You don’t marry someone and feel nothing.
That’s what I have learned is at the core of my truth.
It doesn’t matter that he has done horrible things even directly to me, somehow my heart has room for him anyway even when my mind and soul want to cast him out with the devil.
Maybe he IS the devil, and that’s the problem.
The devil never leaves you once he has possessed you.
A knock comes at the door, and I admittedly jump, startled until I see it is just my CFO and best friend, Paulo. He is smiling and waving at me, and I wave him in, knowing it is about to be lunch time. The day has moved by fast, my head deep in the menial tasks that any secretary could do simply because I feel I don’t deserve any of it. Not that my father does, but I guess it also has to do with Stefan. I don’t want to deal with him. Technically, he still owns the company and won’t give it up for any amount of money. My father has spent the past month trying to no avail. It was Paulo that negotiated my brother taking over certain tasks, but he was made to sign a contract that he knew he wasn’t actually the CEO and would never win the company. That is the only news I have heard of my former husband.
Well, legally he is still my husband, but I have not seen him in a month and don’t think I will ever see him again whether it’s because those that love me won’t let me, or because I won’t let myself.
“Hey, biatch!” Paulo says, always the energetic one. He has been my rock and my only motivation since being back in Texas. I have mostly felt like the dreary, stormy sky threatening to drop tornadoes down on us reflects my mood.
My life is a fucking mess. I can’t even date if I wanted to. I tried once only to find out the guy got in an accident-nearly fatal. I don’t have any proof, but I feel like Stefan had something to do with it.
“Right back at you,” I tell him, a little delayed. I know my smile is not reaching my eyes, and he will be able to tell something is up. I feel particularly down today and can’t explain what’s so different. I am so tired too and have been all weekend. I have done nothing but veg out, which even in this new life is not like me. I at least do something productive if I don’t go out. “So, where do you want to go to lunch today?” I ask, reaching for my purse.
“Well, there’s that new Asian buffet right down the road I was thinking about trying. They are still having a seven ninety-nine deal right now since they are so new.”
We do this twice a week; Mondays and Thursdays. We don’t usually do it on weekends because he is almost always down in Brazil with his new fiancé and his family who thanks me all the time for helping him find a man in their home country. I don’t exactly think I deserve the credit, but they are the closet I have to family now, so I always graciously accept the praise.
I nod in agreement. Not that cheap should really matter with the money we make, but a good deal is a good deal either way. Plus, I love Asian even if it might put on more pounds in the middle than I like. I don’t know why people think that kind of diet keeps you thin with all the rice and sweet sauces.
My phone goes off, and I pull it out. “Just a sec, and we’ll get going. It sounds good to me.”
I look at my phone and see it’s nothing but a reminder, but the reminder gives me pause.
Alert: Remember to log your period.
My period hasn’t even been on my mind since I left Brazil. I have had too much busy work, and now that I think of it, I haven’t had one. I am a week late.
“Woah, girl, that look on your face is scaring me. What is going on?” Paulo asks, noticing how I have frozen in shock, all the color draining from my face at the slight possibility that what I am thinking could be true. I don’t know what I will do, or what it means. I don’t even know what Brazil’s laws are about this considering I am still married to Stefan. But I am getting ahead of myself.
“Oh my god, Paulo, I have been in such a fog I didn’t realize I’d missed my period,” I confess to him.
“Oooh, girl, lunch is going to have to wait today. I think we need to head down to the convenience store down here and get you a test,” Paulo says, yanking me out of my seat.
I am now in panic mode but thankful that I am not facing this possibility alone.
“Okay, yeah, let’s rip of the band-aid here.” He nods his head.
“Let’s go buy it, and then we will order lunch in. You can take the test right here in the office,” he tells me, using his most soothing voice. He knows I won’t be able to wait until tonight at home or until even after I eat, for that matter, to know if my life is about to change in even more ways than it already has.
This is the last thing I need, and I really hope it’s stress that had me missing my lady visitor this month. But I know life often has its own plans that have nothing to do with us mere mortals.
