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But he doesn’t let me finish.
With a ferocious craving, he presses his lips to my forehead, a tremble to his touch. “You can hate me later, but now…just obey me. Please.”
A tear trickles down my cheek. His admission reveals he doesn’t grasp my true feelings for him. “Okay,” I whisper. “But I will never hate you. I can’t.”
He inhales sharply, but I pull away, turning toward the door as I fix my mask. I smile at Sara, unable to say anything because there are no words to thank her for what she’s doing. I open the door coolly and make my way down the hallway, embracing my freedom, whatever the consequences may be.
Day 74
ALLICANthink about is Saint. I have hurt him in unimaginable ways. He sees my apprehension as weakness, but it’s not. Killing Alek won’t make the world a better place because there are three far crueler monsters ready to take his place.
However, it will make the world a better place for Saint because I understand this is about redemption for him. He can’t move on until he ends this chapter in his life once and for all.
So what do I do?
Do I turn a blind eye and allow a man shadowed in darkness, but who has flickers of light shining through, die? My father would have said that everyone deserves a second chance. No matter what one has done, there is always room for forgiveness. If they are trying to change the path they are on, then how can I judge him?
If anyone should be judged, it should be me.
“May I have this dance?” Alek extends his hand, looking more than honored.
We are standing in the middle of the ballroom, the string quartet ready to commence. However, when I stand frozen, hearing whispers echo around the room, sweat begins to collect on his brow. I have never seen him nervous before.
Something catches my attention from the corner of my eye, and I know what or, rather,whoit is. Remembering the heartbreak in Saint’s tone, I slip my hand into Alek’s, cementing another step to my doom.
The music plays right away, and I’m certain I can hear a relieved sigh. He places his hand on my lower back, drawing me close with a smile. “I’ll try not to step on your toes,” I jibe, needing to say something lighthearted before I burst into more tears.
Alek smiles as he leads us into a slow dance.
As everyone stares, and some whisper behind their hands, I wonder what they see. I still don’t have the guts to look at Saint because after our confrontation, I don’t know what to think. He’s angry with me, and he has every right. But I can’t help how I feel.
I can’t take the life of another, no matter what they’ve done. I just can’t.
“You seem distracted,” Alek says, his cheek almost pressed to mine as he lowers his face.
“I do?” I need to be on my A game because the next few minutes are vital.
“I understand this is all a little much. You are most welcome to go upstairs and rest after we’re done here.”
“What about your poker game?”
Alek’s body grows tense. “I wish I’d never agreed. But you’re right. I should get it over with.”
The question lingers about when he intends to take me upstairs.
“Are you nervous?” he asks, in sync with my thoughts.
I shrug, unable to look at him.
“I…” His pause has me lifting my eyes. I see his uneasiness, which is ironic, considering I’m the one who should be nervous. “I wish it could be different.”
“So do I.” And I mean that in every sense of the word.
“You make me…happy, Willow.” I look for any signs of deception, to confirm what Saint said, but I don’t see any. He appears genuine, which makes what I know all the worse.
I wet my dry lips, overshadowed by guilt.
“It’s something I haven’t felt in a very long time. I can see why Saint was so spellbound by you.”
