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The moment of confusion is brief and leaves me a mess before my mind snaps back into focus.
What am I supposed to do?
Run to the bathroom? Wait for them to get seated and leave the hotel through the back door? If there is such a thing. Or sneak out like a thief, hiding behind a waiter’s tray?
What am I supposed to do?
Seat here, risking to meet Kai’s eyes? Whatever explanation he has for this evening, it can’t come in the form of a civil exchange on his way to the table.
What can he say to me?
Why would he say anything to me?
Even if we talk, he’s obviously busy, and I won’t get a satisfying explanation from him.
I start to sweat.
Fuck this.
I don’t want to run away. I don’t want to hide. I haven’t done anything wrong. On the other hand, I don’t want to look like a loser, sitting here alone while they enjoy their dinner.
This man fucked me in his office this afternoon.
And the other man at their table paid a million-dollar fee to fuck me three weeks ago in Miami.
Are they playing the same game with this woman?
Is there a bet?
What is going on?
The crazy thoughts jab at me too damn fast. So fast that I feel sick, but I make an effort and regroup so I can think straight.
Why would I run away?
I will go home.
I won’t be lingering here while he sits at the dinner table. I will walk out when I feel like it, holding my head high.
Also, I won’t ask for an explanation.
And I won’t have time to talk to him if he feels inclined to speak to me.
Oh, I so hate these moments.
I grab my phone and text my driver.
“When I thought this evening couldn’t get any worse…” I mutter quietly to myself, just as the intertwined voices of the four people ring not far from me.
I flick my gaze up casually.
None of them look in my direction. I’m sure he hasn’t noticed me. He is too busy explaining something to the woman who looks like she’s not from here. I don’t know what tips me off.
The fact that she seems unfamiliar with her surroundings?
Him explaining everything every step of the way?
She may be from out of state but he excels at going out of his way to provide detailed information about everything.
