Page 84 of When We Lose


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But was that jealousy? Frustration? Was I a nuisance to him?

He was hot when he fucked me in the bathroom, and then he left without a word.

And later, I didn’t even have the chance to tell him that I butted heads with his father.

“You think he’s done?” I ask incredulously.

“I think he’s having a hard time admitting that he’s done, but we’ll see.”

What he says doesn’t make much sense to me. That’s not the vibe I got from Kai. But Kai is skilled at hiding his true feelings when he wants to. I trust Alejandro. It’s just that I don’t think he’s correct in his assessment.

We exchange a few more words before I realize that no matter how much we talk, his voice can’t replace his touch, and the more we talk, the more I miss his company.

“Okay…” I say softly. “I’ll see you when you get back. I’m here. I have nowhere to go,” I joke, my voice dripping with sadness.

“I can’t wait…” he says, nostalgic as well.

Instead of cheering ourselves up, we’ve made ourselves miss each other even more.

And then I open my mouth and say the words I needed to hear myself…

“I love you, Alejandro.”

It doesn’t take long before he replies.

“I love you too, cariño.”

With that, we end the call, knowing that we’ve done our best.

I fold my arms across the table, lower my head, and press my brow into my sleeve.

Eye closed, I listen to the quiet carols coming from the radio when the roaring noise of a car engine travels from outside.

I flick my head up, my eyes flying to the living room.

This is unusual.

There is virtually no traffic after eight o’clock in the evening unless I come home late.

This must be him.

Kai.

What is he doing here?

I shoot out of the chair, my lips pressed into a tight line, my brow furrowed. Maybe it’s not him.

It’s probably worse if it’s not him, so I grab my baseball bat, although the shovel would be better.

* * *

KAI

An hour earlier.

It’s latewhen I slide into my seat and clutch the wheel, but I don’t leave, waiting for Grayson to get back to me.

He called earlier, but I couldn’t talk, and then he said he’d stay late tonight so we could chat.

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