Page 90 of When We Lose


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I didn’t have time to think about this particular day. But I didn’t imagine this.

Him coming back and not having time for me?

Having no time is not even my problem. The way he’s handled it gets on my nerves. He could’ve talked to me.

Now he wants to talk.

No.

I’m too aggravated.

I spin around when he knocks on the door again as if nothing happened. The door is unlocked. He doesn’t enter. He wants me to give him access to my place.

I lock the door and move away.

His fist hits the door this time as he stubbornly raps on it again. The entire house shakes.

I return, unlock the door, swing it open, and leave it like that before spinning around and moving to the kitchen counter.

I set my hands on the surface, and tilt my gaze down.

I wasn’t joking when I said I couldn’t talk to him.

I’m shaking so hard that my fingers dance on the kitchen counter.

To conceal my nerves, I open the cupboard, retrieve a glass, and walk to the refrigeration.

I pull out a bottle of water and pour the cold liquid into the glass, hoping to calm down.

“I’m listening,” I say, signaling that I won’t talk.

His footsteps resonate inside the house. He closes the door, moves to the table, and pulls out a chair just as I pivot away from the refrigerator.

I go back to the kitchen counter and lean against it. This time I prop my backside against it and cross my arms over my chest.

He sets his elbows on the table and looks down. His neckline is open, the starched collar grazing his neck.

“I was mad at you because I found you at that bar,” he starts.

A sarcastic chuckle leaves my lips, a tide of surprise soaring through me.

Was he?

Is that where he wants to start?

He lifts his eyes and drowns them into mine.

“I know you think you can do whatever you want, and be wherever you want,” he says. “I’m not arguing that. Besides, all of it is true. It’s just that I didn’t expect to see you there. And then…”

He sucks in a long breath and sighs.

“I knew you’d met Cardenas. And given the circumstances, I suspected he had made a move on you.”

“What exactly were the circumstances?” I ask, my heart darkening with every second.

“The woman you saw me with is a business partner. Future business partner. An heiress who currently lives in the UK. She sits on a large sum of money and wants to invest. She represents a British Investment Fund. This meeting was important. I should’ve told you about it. It’s just that I didn’t think it was significant. I didn’t think we would run into a situation like that. And for sure, I didn’t think I needed to defend myself in a hotel lobby, bar, or restaurant, while everybody else was at the table. I knew it looked bad.”

“Looked bad?” I bark. “It wasn’t about looking bad. And it wasn’t only that. You were mad at me. At me. Can you believe that?” I say, my hands hitting my thighs in frustration.“You were mad because I was there, creating a ‘situation’ for you. Excuse me? I didn’t create the situation. And I didn’t plan to go out and have a drink by myself. I wasn’t there celebrating something. I was there forgetting about how shitty my day was. There were so many things… They are not even worth talking about. You think it didn’t cross my mind that you were in that hotel with a bunch of men––amongst them Cardenas––and that woman for maybe something else?”

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