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Roanac staggers a little and coughs, pausing for a moment in his chanting before continuing. Is he killing himself? His scar on his chest is his one weakness. But he just cut it open of his own free will. What’s happening?
Then I see my floating blood start to enter his body through that cut. Oh fuck. This is part of the ritual. This is how he’s taking my blood into him.
The blackness is back around the edges of my vision. I feel nauseous but like I don’t even have the strength to do anything about it. I can’t even spit out the bile choking my throat. I can only watch, getting weaker and weaker, as my blood continues to flow into Roanac’s body. He’s just straight up stealing my blood and taking it into him, no purification needed. And there’s nothing I can do about it. To my shame, tears prick at the corners of my eyes. I’m helpless and trapped, and I can’t even spend my last moments fighting back. I’m stuck.
And then something starts to shift in me. My blood stops feeling like, well, blood, or whatever it normally feels like. Instead it begins to feel electric. Like it’s burning and bright inside of me. I don’t know what’s happening. It should hurt, but it doesn’t, not quite. It’s just strange.
My breathing picks up as panic starts setting in. What’s happening to me? Is Roanac doing this to me?
The strange electric feeling continues to build inside of me even as I continue to grow weaker. But in a strange consolation, Roanac seems to be getting weaker as well. He’s bracing both hands on the table and his chanting is constant, but slower. He looks a little pale. Could it be that my blood is too much for him? Or opening up the scar on his chest will still kill him even if it’s for this ritual?
I can only hope. Maybe this will all go wrong, and he’ll die too. The blackness gets stronger, leeching from the corners of my vision to begin taking over completely. Hopefully this will all go horribly wrong and Roanac will die too. Even if I die as well, so long as Roanac is stopped, it’ll be okay. I have to admit I never imagined going out like this. And I hate it. But if it means that Roanac dies then it’ll have been worth it.
The shouts of the men continue, yelling obscenities and calling for me. They haven’t stopped this whole time, and that’s comforting. I can hear them even as my vision goes completely black. I’m sad, horribly sad, that the last thing of them I’ll hear is the three of them angry and in pain, but at least they’re still alive.
Please get out of here,I think. I wish I could yell it, but my mouth isn’t working. I can’t move.Get out of here while you still can.
If I die and then they die trying to rescue me, I don’t know that I could stand it. I mean, I’ll be dead so maybe I won’t care but right now I’m still alive, and I do care. Even if I die, I want them safe. I want them to make it out of this.
At least the last thing I’ll get to hear is them. Even if they then have to see me dead. I don’t wish that on them. I hope that they’ll be okay. That they’ll support each other and get through this somehow.
The selfish, scared part of me wants them to be here. Even though I know that it’s not safe for them to be near Roanac and that they should probably flee, I want them to be here. Standing with me. I don’t want to die alone, without them. Before, dying was always a big possibility. I was aware that I could get killed on a job, and I was okay with that. I wanted to live, but I wasn’t upset at the idea of dying by myself. Why would I be? There was nobody I missed and nobody to miss me, just my parents, and then if I died hopefully I’d just be with them again.
But I’m not just drifting through life anymore. I’ve got people I love, people to live for, and I don’t want to leave this world without a goodbye to them. It seems so cruel and hurts me almost more than the physical pain of my blood being pulled from my body. I don’t want to leave them. I don’t want to be without them!
I try to yell back for them, to at least say their names. I want them to know that I’m thinking about them in my last moments, that I love them, that I can hear them fighting for me and that I appreciate it. That even if they won’t succeed, I know they tried, and I love them for it. But I can’t get myself to move anymore.
It’s almost like my dreams, actually. My visions. I’m in my body, but I can’t control what’s happening. I wonder if this means North was wrong. If I die here, after all, then my visions never came true. Maybe it really was just some crazy dream or something.
I try wiggling my fingers, and opening my mouth. I’m going to fight, I’m not going to go down just lying here crying, but I can’t seem to… get myself to move… any more…
Huh. It’s odd, but the yelling of the men seems to be even louder. There’s a massive bang and a crash, and I realize,oh, they’ve managed to break down the door.It’s followed by pounding footsteps and yells that seem to come from right next to me and very far away at the same time,Kiara, Kiara, hang on Kiara, we’re coming for you!
That’s nice,I think, and then it all goes black for good.
CHAPTER24
Am I dead?
Being dead feels a lot like waking up after a shitty night’s sleep. The kind where you know that you technically slept, but it doesn’t feel like you actually rested. Ugh. I’d hoped that dying would mean an end to feeling crappy, but I guess not?
I become aware of myself bit by bit. There’s this feeling of just floating, like I’m in a vat of nothingness, and I am the nothing. In a way it feels similar to when I had my first vision with my Sight. I’m not in control, and I can’t even be sure of where my body is. I think I’m in it, but I don’t feel like I’m properly attached to it. I can’t control it.
Then I start to feel things again, and the crappy feeling of not getting enough sleep appears. It spreads through me, bit by bit, until I can wiggle my fingers and toes again.
Ow, my head really fucking hurts. Yeah, definitely concussed.
But wait.
If I can feel my injury from when Roanac slammed my head into the wall, then I can’t be dead. I wouldn’t feel that if I was dead, I’m pretty fucking sure.
Terror seizes me. What if Roanac’s turned me into some horrible undead creature to serve him? What if I’m some sort of awful abomination now?
I blink my eyes open. Hoo boy. Even just lying down I feel dizzy. I need to take a moment. I breathe carefully, deeply. My chest, oddly, doesn’t hurt. It feels like it’s healed.
How am I alive? And where am I? I’m staring up at a ceiling that is definitely not made of stone. I’m lying on a bed, not a stone slab. The atmosphere and lighting around me is different. What’s going on?
I stir, trying to sit up, and instantly North, Raven, and Cain surround me.
