AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“How?” In my experience, all that having this connection did was drain me of my energy as I was bombarded with everyone’s thoughts and feelings.
“It makes us like a hive mind, almost, like insects,” Tiorelle says. “Have you ever seen a flock of birds all flying and diving in sync, or fish evading a predator by coordinating their movements? It’s all done with only a thought, without having to speak, without any hesitation. An instant, and the movement is done by all. What army could possibly be more effective than that if we were led in such a fashion?”
Tiorelle speaks with such regality, it’s hard for me not to believe in what she’s saying. It’s obvious why she’s such a good queen. You just like to listen to her, you believe in her authority, and you want to do what will make her happy.
But I really don’t know if I’m up to this. “I’m not sure if that’s really possible.”
Being connected to everyone is so overwhelming. How could I manage to control it enough to give orders? And to coordinate people during a battle? That would be nuts. I’m just a burglar, not any kind of leader, how did I end up in this position?
“It’s definitely possible,” Nahini says. “I can teach you how to use your power.”
“I’m not saying that it’s not possible,” I reply. “I mean, it makes sense. We’re all connected as fae, and if one person has powerful enough magic in them, sure they can boost that connection and communicate with all of us mentally. I’m surprised nobody’s thought to try to do it before.”
“Nobody was powerful enough before,” Tiorelle says.
“But I’m not sure that I’m the person to do it.”
“You already have a much stronger connection to the All-Soul than any of us,” Tiorelle says gently. She sounds like she’s used to helping coax people into her way of thinking. “And what do we have to lose by trying to explore that and see if we can use it to help us? We’re already in danger of facing extinction. I think that this is a reasonable thing to look at.”
“I think it’s a slim hope,” I protest. “I don’t want to let any of you down. I don’t want you to have too much faith in me.”
North and Raven each put a hand on my shoulder, as if to reassure me that they have faith in me. Cain speaks up loyally. “Kiara is strong and resourceful. You won’t be disappointed in what she can do and how much she can take.”
I appreciate that my mates stand behind me, but I’m still scared of failing and letting everyone down. I’ve never had anyone in my life, not really, so there was nobody to disappoint. Even my cheating ex-boyfriend, well, it was easy to keep him happy. I didn’t have to really think about our relationship, and I never let him in close enough for me to feel anything other than frustration and general annoyance when he cheated on me.
This is different. This is people that I love depending on me. This is the fae, my people, the people that I lost and thought I would never get to be a part of again, looking to me for leadership and power. How can I possibly do this if I think I might fail?
Tiorelle gives me a reassuring smile, as if she can read my mind. Who knows, maybe she can. Maybe thanks to the All-Soul I’m now blasting my insecurities into everybody’s brains. “I’m certain this is the right course of action, Kiara. Your mates show great faith in you, and I fully plan on following their lead. I believe in you. And I believe in Nahini’s skills as a teacher. I think this is our best chance. We will strike with the vampires as an army, with you as our leader.”
My nerves are jangling, but I don’t see what other choice I have. I swallow hard. “I hope that I won’t let you down.”
“You won’t,” Tiorelle promises me.
Well, we’ll see about that.
To my surprise, Nahini insists that I take a nap before I begin training. We don’t have a lot of time, but she says that there’s no way I can be expected to do well if I’m not rested. She gives me some kind of potion that conks me out for a couple of hours, and I really do wake up feeling refreshed.
Nahini has me join her out in the grassy area in the middle of the village. “First things first,” she says. “We need to do this so that you can control us without passing out. You’re no good to us if we overwhelm you and you can’t filter through us.”
Yeah, makes sense. I wince, feeling like a weakling for not being able to take care of this already.
Nahini might be tough, and she definitely intimidates me, but she’s not unkind. She doesn’t make me feel guilty or point out anything negative. She just gets down to brass tacks.
The first exercises we do are about me opening up that box in my brain and connecting to all of the fae around me, then closing it off again. Opening and closing, opening and closing, until I can do that with just a split-second thought and it’s no longer a struggle. Then she has me see about trying to find her thoughts among all of the hundreds that are swirling in my brain.
“It’s about control,” she tells me as I sink to my knees yet again, dripping in sweat. The jungle heat sure isn’t helping. “If you can’t control yourself and how you access this power, then you can’t be expected to control everyone else and speak to them as a leader. Let’s do it again.”
She’s calm but relentless. The kind of gym coach that tells you encouragingly to just do ten more, then tells you in that same tone to do just ten more after that.
It takes me hours, but at last I can pick out Nahini’s thoughts and emotions out of the crowd. Then she wants me to do that with any random fae, to make their inner voice be the only one I’m listening to and have me shut out everyone else, or at least get the rest of the fae down to a dull murmur that I can ignore.
It’s easier when she asks me to listen for the voices of my mates, or to Queen Tiorelle. People that I already know. The stronger my connection to them, the easier and faster I pick out their voice and silence the others. But I know that I can’t rely on that. In the middle of battle, I might have to listen to any random fae that I don’t know, so I have to be able to do this with strangers.
“You’re basically a conduit,” Nahini tells me. “You join the fae even closer than the All-Soul normally does. Stop trying to think of it as something you have to control and think of it as a power you can just let flow through you into everyone. It’s not about you having to contain all of this power. Think of yourself as a channel for a river to run through. You’re not stopping the water, you’re just directing it down a particular route.”
Huh. I hadn’t even realized how much I was seeing this power as something inside of me that I had to control until Nahini put it that way. What she’s saying makes a lot of sense. Once I think of it that way, I’m able to work more easily with it.
Once I can listen to the fae, then I have to be able to communicate with them. Once again, we start with Nahini, and I try to give her instructions so that she can do what I tell her. Then we up it to two people, then three, until I’m leading a whole group of fae.
