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“I’m fine,” I answered, but I was so lost in my thoughts, I couldn’t say anything else.
“Did he… did he touch you?”
“I can’t… I can’t think about that at the moment,” I answered truthfully. “I believe… I’m going to be sick.”
As we reached my room, I ran for the chamber pot which was at the far end of the room, located behind a privacy screen. And once it was in my hands, I lost the contents of my stomach. More than once. Placing the chamber pot back on the floor, I reached for the jug of water on the table opposite my bed and was surprised to find Nicolo sitting on my bed. I had imagined he would have left while I was retching.
“Charlotte,” he said as he looked up at me. “Are you alright?”
I didn’t know how to answer that. No, I wasn’t alright.
“I…” I breathed in deeply.
“Speak your truth,” he ordered.
“I wish you would leave, Master,” I answered on a small intake of breath. I needed nothing more right now than to be alone. The realization of the situation before me was so overwhelming, I almost felt handicapped by it.
I’d judged Nicolo for being friends with Balduin, butIwas working for the awful man. And the truth was that if I accomplished Balduin’s deed, I’d be helping him gain even greater power, because without Nicolo, his actions would be completely unchecked.
“Very well,” Nicolo said as he stood and started for the door. When he reached it, he paused and turned back to face me. “I will give you your solitude this evening but tomorrow, I want to discuss the events of this evening.”
I didn’t respond other than to look at him and nod. He nodded in return and then closed the door behind him, leaving me alone.
I immediately fell on my bed as sobs began to wrack me and I cried into the bed linens, feeling hopelessly and completely useless.
The Guild always claimed that client identities were kept secret out of professional courtesy, but they were also kept secret to stop assassins from growing a conscience and starting to think; does this man deserve to die? Whether or not Nicolo deserved to die was a question I couldn’t answer, but doing Balduin’s bidding stuck in my throat after what I’d seen.
That poor little boy.
***
A few hours later and I still couldn’t sleep. I’d been tossing and turning all evening. And when I finally decided sleep was going to elude me for good, I decided to return to Nicolo’s room—I didn’t want to wait to talk to him in the morning. I needed to tell him nothing had passed between Balduin and me because it was clear he believed something had.
The Guards were already there when I arrived.
“He’s not in,” said one of them when I went to knock. “He was summoned by the queen.”
I nodded, said goodnight and walked away casually before breaking into a run. Even for Master Nicolo, a royal summons was a rarity. The Old Queen saw few people, marshalling her strength in what surely had to be the last years of her long life. Thus, to have called for Nicolo in the dead of night? That was stranger still.
Back in my room I changed into my blacks, clambered out through the window and set off across the roofs in the direction of the King’s Tower.
***
The queen’s bedroom chamber was a large room on the third floor, but what mattered about it, from my perspective, was that it had a convenient window, hung with ivy, at which a person could perch and listen in on all that was being said within.
“… and most enjoyable.” I caught the end of the queen’s sentence. “However, it would be remiss of me on a night of celebration not to give credit where it was deserved. It is not the first time you have saved Balduin, and I am as grateful as ever, Nicky.”
‘Nicky?!’ It was akin to someone calling a werewolf ‘Fido’.
“I live to serve, your Majesty,” replied Nicolo, kneeling before the monarch with his head bowed.
The queen approached the master, walking with the aid of a stick, and laid a hand on his shoulder. She was dressed in her evening wear, her long gray hair pulled back into a simple braid that ran down the middle length of her back.
“Can you not even look at me anymore?”
Nicolo looked up and I was surprised to see what looked like a genuine smile on his face.
“It’s just us, Nicky,” the Old Queen smiled back. “And I apologize for summoning you from your slumber.”
