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I hadn’t been asleep, having just returned to the room moments before her alarm went off, but I pretended to be passed out. I didn’t know what to say to her. Once I heard her leave the room, I rolled over and stared at the ceiling for a long time before sleep finally took over.
I don’t know how long I slept, and I had woken up several times. My head was spinning.
This was it.
We’d find out if she were going to the next stage soon.
I might lose her forever.
Knowing how freaking amazing she was, I expected she would get good news today. Just the thought of her moving away made my heart drop.
I was going to lose her, and I should be happy for her. She was living her dream, something I admired more than anything in the world.
I just didn’t want her to leave.
I was so torn.
Part of me wanted her to not get the job, but that was wrong. It was selfish of me. Even if she didn’t get this job, there’d be others. She had no desire to stay in Sunville, and I couldn’t force her to do so.
I sighed and tried to sleep a bit longer when I heard the key card open the lock. I checked the time; it was almost two and I hadn’t gotten up yet. I hadn’t showered. I hadn’t eaten anything since the sandwich I grabbed the night before on my walk around town late at night. I wasn’t hungry. I felt nothing but anxiety as I waited for Anna to enter the room.
Her reaction would tell me everything. I sat up as she entered and waited with bated breath. She just stared at me, a blank expression I couldn’t read.
Finally, I said, “Well? How’d it go?”
Anna let out a scream and started dancing around the room, as if my question had given her permission to celebrate. My heart sank, but I put on a smile for her. She deserved that.
“I take it you got it?” I asked, infusing my voice with as much excitement as I could, even though I never was much of an actor.
She started speaking a hundred miles an hour. “Yes! I mean, not yet. I mean, there’s another step - one last step. A two-week working interview in Tanzania! I’m going to Africa for two weeks and then we’ll see, but the fact that I made it to this next round is amazing! Only ten of us out of thousands were chosen and three of us will be offered the opportunity so my odds are pretty decent… Oh my God, I’m going to Africa, Levi!”
I stood up and hugged her, mostly to hide my face in her hair, praying she wouldn’t be able to see the look of defeat on my face. “Congratulations, Anna. You deserve this, and I’m so proud of you.”
I meant every word. None of that was a lie.
“Thanks, Levi,” she said, her voice a lot softer now.
She pulled away from the hug, and I felt sheepish, remembering what happened the night before. “Anna, I–”
Before I could apologize for telling her how I felt, she held up a hand to stop me and made a beeline for the bathroom. She slammed the door behind her, but I ran over to it and spoke to her through it. “Anna?”
I heard coughing.
“Are you okay?”
She wasn’t coughing, she was throwing up.
“Yeah, fine,” she said. More retching.
“Are you sure? You sound sick to me.”
“It’s nerves,” she called back. “I couldn’t even eat this morning, I was so nervous about the interview and, well, everything.”
That everything likely had a lot to do with me.
“I’m sorry, but clearly you wowed them, so you had nothing to worry about.”
The coughing ceased and I heard the toilet flush. Then running water from the sink. A few moments later, the door opened, and she smiled.
