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I went back inside and gave it to her.
Chapter 19
Anna
“Anna! Are you ready?”
It wasn’t even twenty-four hours after the engagement party, and I had to go out again. This time for Emily’s bachelorette party.
“I’m almost ready.”
Truth be told, I was tired and had spent the last twenty-four hours locked in my room, trying to recover from everything that had happened the day before. I had cried more than I had in a long time. I certainly wasn’t up for yet another celebration.
I’d told my sister we had a little fight yesterday, that’s why I had asked her to pick me up, but I didn’t go into the details. I had stressed that it was no big deal.
It felt anything but little now.
I looked in the mirror. At least I could be casual today, just jeans and a t-shirt. My hair was pulled back into a high ponytail. No makeup. I could just be me.
I grabbed my purse and exited my room to find both Grace and Emily all decked out. Emily didn’t surprise me; she used any excuse to dress up. But Grace had gone above and beyond - wearing a slinky black dress and high heels. Her hair was curled, and she wore more makeup than I’d ever seen her wear before.
“Emily got a hold of you?”
“Since you turned her away, she found me,” Grace said, running a hand through her curls. “But honestly, it’s been a while since I got dressed up and went out. It’s nice. Makes me feel young again.”
“Hush, you aren’t old.”
“Yeah, but I’m a mom now, so I automatically feel ten years older than I am. Just you wait and see, Em.”
Emily beamed.
We were taking it pretty easy. The old, non-pregnant Emily likely would have wanted to head to the clubs. Since she couldn’t drink, however, she settled for something a little more laid back. A local band she and James had liked since high school were playing at an outdoor venue nearby. Family friendly. Nothing too wild. There’d be dancing and some music, but mostly low key.
I followed my sisters, mostly keeping to myself as they talked about kids and babies and what Emily’s life would be like in a few months. I had nothing to offer to the conversation, but my heart sank thinking about the day before.
Levi had been disappointed that the test was negative.
He wasn’t the only one.
I hated to admit it to myself, and I knew feelings were complicated, but I found myself nearly in tears when I stared at the negative test. I had secretly hoped it would be positive. If it were, I wouldn’t be able to leave. I couldn’t go to Africa if I were expecting his child. The decision would be out of my hands and Levi and I could settle down, have a family… but I knew, in my heart, that if I missed out on this chance, I might always regret it.
Yet part of me had hoped the decision was taken out of my hands.
“Earth to Anna!” Emily and Grace were waiting for me to get in the car.
“Oh right, sorry.” I’d been so lost in thought, I forgot what I was doing.
I needed to forget about the test. It had been negative. There would be no baby. I’d never thought I wanted children, but hearing my sisters talk about their babies caused a pang in my chest.
I stayed quiet for the trip to the venue, and as we got out of the car, Emily asked me, “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” I lied.
“Is it the fight with Levi?” she asked me in hushed tones. “Please tell me it wasn’t more serious than you told me about yesterday.”
“No, no, it wasn’t,” I lied. “Just a lover’s spat. We’ve already made up.”
I hadn’t spoken to Levi since I left his house.
