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“Pino, it’s Pat. Can you hear me?” she asks, looking down at her watch as she places her fingers over my father’s pulse.
I’m standing off to the side, watching anxiously and hoping I didn’t imagine that the last two minutes actually happened. As she reaches into her pocket and produces a penlight, she moves the ray of light side to side and gasps when my father’s eyes seem to follow the movement.
“What’s going on?” I ask, diving forward.
She turns around and smiles. “I think your father is showing signs of awareness. This is great news, Dr. Mathews. I’ll have to call the doctor to confirm, though.”
“Yes, please do.” I can’t stand still, so I begin pacing the grass with both hands atop my head. I listen to Pat put in a call to the doctor, who says he’s on his way. Maddy looks like she wants to comfort me, but she doesn’t. And honestly, I can only deal with one drama at a time.
Pat senses my tension and walks over to me. “He’s going to be just fine, Dr. Mathews.” She places her hand on my forearm and smiles kindly. “He’s in good hands.”
Her reassurance makes me feel better, and without thinking, I place my hand over hers. “Thank you, Pat.” She nods and goes back to checking on my father.
When I turn to look at Maddy, I see that her face is pulled into a tight scowl. I have no idea what’s wrong, and as I open my mouth, about to ask if she’s okay, she barks, “I better go.”
“Go?” I ask, frowning. “You don’t have to. The doctor will be here in just a minute.”
She shakes her head. “I’m sure you’ve got all the help you need.” When she glares at Pat, I suddenly understand what’s wrong. She’s jealous.
“Madison,” I chide, not hiding the fact that I know what’s bugging her.
But she doesn’t want to hear it. “I hope your dad is okay. I’ll check in tomorrow.” She rushes off, but I follow in hot pursuit.
“Madison, you’re being ridiculous! Absolutely nothing is going on with Pat and me. She’s my father’s nurse, that’s all,” I whisper, not wanting Pat to overhear. “Please stop.”
Madison does stop, but she spins around angrily. “I wish I could believe you, but I can’t! And I hate that I feel this way. Before all of this happened, I wouldn’t have thought twice about it. But now, all I can think is do you find her attractive, or have you had sex with her!”
I sigh, pressing a hand to my brow. “I can assure you having sex with anybody right now is the furthest thought from my mind!”
She flinches, taking a step back as I don’t mask my annoyance. After a few seconds, she frowns. “I’m sorry, Dixon. I’ve made this about me, and I shouldn’t have. This is about your father. Go be with him.”
I want to say so many things, but she’s right. This isn’t about her. It isn’t about me, either. It’s about my dad. And I won’t allow my selfishness to get in the way of his well-being any longer. I don’t want to do this, but I have no other choice.
“I’m sorry you can’t stick around, but you’re right. This is about him. It was nice seeing you, but I think it’s best…if we cutall ties. I can’t keep living in this state of uncertainty any longer. It hurts too much. You can still visit my father. I will just ensure I’m not here when you do.”
Her face drops, and she blinks back her tears, but she takes it in stride and nods. “Okay.”
Every inch of my body is clamoring not to turn around. I shove down my better judgment and take one last look at the love of my life before doing what’s right. The doctor comes rushing down the hill, and I follow him, focusing on nothing but my father.
I look on eagerly, observing every single thing he does. I breathe out a sigh of relief when my father responds with a slight nod or a forced blink to the doctor’s questions. After a couple of minutes, the doctor turns to me and smiles.
“It appears your father has woken up.” I have no idea what that means, but it’s far better than him being asleep.
When my father’s eyes suddenly meet mine, my entire body breaks out into a cold sweat. This is the first time I’ve actually seen him alert, and it scares the living hell out of me.
“Papà?” I say, stepping closer, not knowing what to expect. But he didn’t raise me to be a coward. “Papà? Sono io, tuo figlio.”
He watches me closely, his breathing short and shallow. I walk closer and closer until I am standing inches away. I wait, not knowing what else to do. Just as I’m about to give up hope, he opens his mouth slowly.
“Pino? What is it?” Pat says, leaning in close.
But his eyes never waver from mine as he lets out two breathless gasps of air before uttering, “Fottuto idiota.”
The doctor turns to me, hands raised in confusion. “What did he just say?”
I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. The first words to come out of my father’s mouth are words I was so not expecting to hear. Either way, I’m just happy he spoke.
Laughing maniacally, I reply, “He just called me…a fucking idiot.”
