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I scowl back at him, jealous and covetous of that, and then keep walking. I should be doing it, too. I should be out there, living and enjoying the merits of my wealth with someone by my side. I kick at a vase, toppling it over in my resentment because instead I’m here, avoiding my actual reality and musing invented scenarios that do not belong to me.
“Go back to her, Gray,” his voice calls. “The night isn’t over yet.” I halt at his words and turn to him, trying to ignore them and failing. He’s walking to his piano again, wine bottle dangling from his fingertips, as if his night is far from over. “What does it matter? Take it all before you can’t. Live it,” he drawls quietly. “Better to go too far, than not far enough.”
Live.
I look away from him towards the stairs, debating, and then start moving back to her without any more thought. One night. He’s right. One night and then it all goes away again and I’m wasting what I’ve got left.
Swift legs carry me along the corridors, fingers itching for the feel of her in a bed, in luxury and quiet normality. Sheets and pillows. Hands that take their time rather than turn forceful and aggressive to deny their wants. Why her? I chuckle and haul my ass up the stairs, rounding through more hallways when I’ve managed to get myself up them. I don’t know why her. I don’t even care. She just is. She’s there and embedded and making me think irrationally about anything and everything.
My hand twists the handle, a long breath pulled in because of the inevitability of this room and what I’m about to do, and I stall again. What we’ve already done is one thing, doing what I’m considering, aching for, is another realm entirely. How do I stop it then? Why would I? Irrespective, I push on the handle some more until the door swings wide and I’m met with the vision of her near naked on the bed, sheets and comforters thrown around and crumpled.
The gold chain lies absently alongside her face, half of it scrunched up in her grip and wound around her fingers as if she’s been twining it. Her face seems peaceful now. No grumblings or mutterings like she was doing before I left. Maybe she’s finding solace again while she sleeps, recharging drained batteries and remembering who she’s become while she’s been here.
I close the door behind me quietly and push deeper into the room, stopping when I reach the end of the bed so I can gaze on her some more. Dark hair spills out effortlessly, her pale form almost matching the sheets she’s resting on. I pull the end of them, inching the material from her skin to show the inscriptions of our time together more clearly.
Everywhere seems marked in some way. Handprints, scratches, reddened patches that will bruise and linger for weeks, reminding her each day of where we have been and what we have done. Even her lips are swollen and discoloured, torn slightly at the corner from when I couldn’t hold back any longer.
My tongue licks over my own lips, fingers pulling the sheets off her entirely, as I unstrap my watch. Time will be as time will be here.
We’ll wake when we do and then it will be time to leave.
Chapter 19
Hannah
He’s here again. I can feel him in my dreams.
I smile into the sounds of summer around me. Birds chirping, sun beating down on me. I don’t know where I am, but it’s so warm and relaxing that I don’t care. I’m walking. Walking slowly across somewhere to get to wherever he is. A sarong around my waist, bare feet on pure white sand that sinks under me with each step I take. A cheeky smile eventually comes into view, his hand waving in the distance as he hurries the beach between us to get to me.
Me.
He’s running to me.
Confusion begins to grow inside as a presence comes into view behind him. Taller, wider, and darker. It casts a shadow that eclipses the smile in front of it, obliterating what was once there for me to see. My feet stop, body unsure what to do for the best, as the shadow gets closer and a heartbeat builds loudly somewhere.
Thud, thud. Thud, thud, thud, thud.
No tapping. No sound other than that thud now. It means something. It calls in waves, pulling me, and towing me into the shadows. It’ll be cold there, though.
The sun will leave and stop heating me.
I lift my head and back up a step, as the creep of obscurity tries to inch over my toes. It won’t, not unless I allow it. I stare, daring it to get too close, and watch it slowly crawling across the sand in search of me. Left, right. Scanning and creeping.
Fine, it can come, but I won’t be dowsed in fear because of it. I will stand firm, fight it if I have to. Thuds or not, I’ll win this battle because I am more than it. Solid. Impenetrable.
A fortress it will not tear down.
Gentleness touches me. It starts rippling over my feet and ankles. Smooth and tender. I shiver and frown under it, wondering why it isn’t cold. It should be. It should have drowned out this sun, sucked the heat out of me and rendered me desolate without it. I freeze, as I watch it lick up my legs, inch by inch, until the finality of it obscuring me leaves me breathless and panting in its wake. So undemanding. Gentle yet surging, as it sweeps around my skin. And warm.
Why so warm?
A kiss. I can feel it on my lips, feel it teasing and taking my breath with it. Heavy. It’s heavy on me, like a weighted blanket smothering me down and keeping me warm. Down it goes. Down and down and down, the blanket slipping over me, passing my stomach, hip bones.
I moan at the sudden sensation that assaults my skin, willing it to heighten, amplify and take me with it. So smooth on me, creating waves of bliss to linger in and enthral into me. More power on my flesh, more heat. I can feel it flushing me, burning and beginning to scorch. I revel in it and my body starts undulating and squirming, part in need of escape and yet desperate to cling on, hold on. My fingers reach for it, grabbing at nothing but air over and over again until they finally find solidity.
My eyes fly open at the feel of it, thoughts and blurred gaze desperately searching for the thing I’m holding, and that’s when I see Gray looking up at me from the bed. I suck in breaths at the vision, body coming back to reality because of the look of him down there. Harsh eyes between my legs, hooded and wicked, as he moves slowly and drags his tongue through me. My legs are in his curled arms, the splay of his fingers holding me in place as he carries on dragging his tongue leisurely, torturously.
His teeth nip gently, as I let go of the sides of his head and reach for sheets to nail into instead. Anything. “You’re awake,” he mutters, still licking. “Good. We have more night left yet.”
