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Chapter Seventeen
Jaime
I crush the Doritos and stir them into the taco salad, while Grandma pulls her famous potato salad from the fridge. She’s humming along to the new Justin Timberlake song on the radio, which instantly puts a smile on my face. Not that I’m lacking for smiles much lately anyway. Anytime I see, hear, or think about Ryan, a smile graces my lips.
“I’m glad to see your father has help at the grill today,” Grandma says casually, but the meaning is clear. She’s happy Ryan is here.
Glancing out the window in the kitchen of my childhood home, I take in the sight of Ryan helping my dad flip burgers and brats. It’s a sight I all but gave up on seeing before he came along.
“Me too. They seem to get along well.”
“Of course they do. Your dad sees Ryan for who he is: A sweet, caring man who’s in love with his daughter.”
Grandma’s words startle me. In love with me? She thinks he’s in love with me? Sure, Ryan confessed last night that he’s falling for me, but full-blown love? It hasn’t been long enough to fall in love, has it?
“You think so?” I ask, the words all but lodging in my dry throat.
“I don’t think. I know. You can see it in his eyes when he looks at you. All day I’ve caught him staring at you when you’re not looking. His eyes lighten and soften at the same time, and a little smile plays at the corner of his lips every time. He’s in love with you.”
Realization slams into me hard. Sure, I’ve fallen in love with him, but to know that the feeling could be reciprocated leaves me lightheaded and breathy. I never expected this. Hell, I never even wanted this, but here I am, in love with a wonderful man who makes me happy. Every second that I’m with him, memories of Gavin become cloudier and more distant. The hurt and pain that I experienced then is replaced with smiling brown eyes and tender touches.
“I take it you’re in love with him, too, right?” Grandma says behind me, pulling my gaze from Ryan at the grill. “I mean, I’ve never seen you look at anyone the way you look at him. And that includes the douche bag who will not be named on this gloriously sunny day.”
Chuckling at Grandma’s bluntness, I confirm what she already knows. “Yes, I’m in love with him.”
“Good. Now what are you going to do about it?” she asks, grabbing the basket filled with plastic silverware.
“I don’t know,” I confess. “I’m scared.”
Turning to face me, Grandma looks me square in the eye. “Love is a scary thing, honey. When I realized I loved your grandpa, he was ready to head off to boot camp. I was terrified that I would never see him again, or worse, that he would forget all about me.”
Realizing I’d never heard this story, I sit down on the stool, and encourage her to continue. “What happened?”
“He left for Texas and wrote me every day. Turns out, he was afraid I’d find someone else and forget about him, so he took a few minutes at the end of his day to write me. Those letters kept me going when I was sad. They brought me comfort when I was lonely. He told me he loved me every day, even when he wasn’t here to do it face-to-face.”
“I didn’t know that. When did you see him again?”
“When he graduated boot camp, I rode with his parents to Texas in a station wagon with no air conditioning and windows that barely worked. It was a long, exhausting trip, but so worth it. I got to see him graduate with his peers and friends in the Army. As soon as the ceremony was over, he ran across the yard, threw his arms around me, and asked me to marry him as soon as possible.”
“That’s the sweetest.” Tears fill my eyes as I picture my young grandfather proposing to my grandma.
“It really was. Then we snuck off to the car and did it until we were both so exhausted we couldn’t move.”
“Grandma,” I chastise.
“Jaime, just know that it’ll all work out if it is meant to be. I know this is scary for you, but don’t be afraid of it. Embrace it. Love is a beautiful thing if you let it in your heart.”
Pulling her into an impromptu hug, I let her words wash over me. I vow that as difficult as it’s going to be, I won’t run and hide from Ryan or the love he’s offering. When the time comes to have the conversation, I’ll tell him what’s written in my heart. As difficult as it will be to say the words for the first time since Gavin broke my heart, I’ll tell him exactly how I feel.
“Come on, sweetie. Let’s get all this food out there before the natives start to get restless.”
I follow Grandma outside, arms full of side dishes. When Ryan catches my eye, there’s no mistaking the smile he gives me, or the look of love in his eyes.
It’s time I embrace it.
***
Ryan slides in beside me at the picnic table. Both of our plates are loaded up with enough food to feed a small country. My eyes were definitely bigger than my stomach. I try to eat on the healthier side, but that still doesn’t stop me from making a fully loaded cheeseburger and adding taco salad, Grandma’s potato salad, strawberry Jell-O salad, baked beans, and a deviled egg to my plate.
