Page 25 of Pants On Fire


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I practically slam the door shut and pray for the earth to open and swallow me. It never happens, however. Whatdoeshappen, though, is a constant repeat of his naked butt right in front of me. I’ll never get that image out of my mind, not that I want to. No, just the opposite actually. I’d take that picture with me through the rest of my life, happily pulling it out of my memory bank to ogle it over and over and over again.

Right now isn’t the time, however. We’re late for breakfast with my ex and a football game with half my graduating class. And I have to try to figure out how to not picture Rueben’s ass every time I look him in the eye.

Should be easy.

Not.

***

“Sorry we’re late,” I state as we approach Danny’s table. He’s sitting there in deep conversation with a blonde woman. The moment they hear me speak, they both break apart, rather guiltily, actually, and turn to look at us.

Ellen Montgomery.

Well, this day just keeps getting better and better.

“Cricket, hi! It’s so good to see you again,” she coos, standing up to give me a hug.

I’m too shocked to return the gesture, but finally mumble a quick. “Hi.”

“I’m glad you two could make it. I know what it’s like being in a new relationship and never wanting to leave your hotel room,” Danny says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively to me and Rueben.

My fake boyfriend holds out my chair and waits for me to sit before taking his own seat. Always the gentleman. Danny never held out a chair or opened a door, unless it was to catch a glimpse down my shirt. I grab the menu, blatantly ignoring the awkwardness of this breakfast date after only the first five seconds. Unfortunately, I’m unable to ignore the way Danny reaches over and grabs Ellen’s hand, bringing it to his mouth and placing a kiss on her knuckles.

There’s a squeeze in my stomach, one that is both nauseating and revolting. Two things I’ve associated with Danny in the last decade. Rueben takes the seat beside me and squeezes my hand under the table. Comfort washes through me as we sit together, and our eyes connect. He gives me a friendly smile that makes my heart dance, and I can’t help but feel grateful that the embarrassment from earlier this morning is gone.

We’re back to friends.

Who cares if one friend has seen the other’s naked ass?

We’re both adults here. We can coexist and not fantasize about the other’s nakedness, right?

Easier said than done, I’ll admit, but I’m determined to do just that. I’m not about to ruin many years’ worth of a friendship just because I can’t handle a little ass. A very,verynice ass.

Shaking my head, I glance across the table and find Danny staring at me. I quickly look away, hating the feeling of him watching, dissecting me. The waitress arrives and fills up our coffee cups. I add a splash of cream and two sugar packets, stirring my drink and taking a long sip. Rueben sips his black, something I recall from college. He was the only guy I knew who actually drank black coffee. Danny prefers his not tasting at all like coffee. He’s more of a fancy latte guy.

“So, are you both ready for the game?” Rueben asks our tablemates between sips of coffee.

“I amsoready! It’s been so long since I’ve been to a football game. Of course, it won’t be the same as seeing my Danny out on the field like I used to,” Ellen replies. Again, Danny brings her hand to his mouth and nibbles a little on her fingers.

As sickening as it is to watch their gross display of affection, it’s her comment that is more revolting. She makes it sound like he was hers way back when he used to play. I’m the one who was wearing his number. I was the one who joined him on the field to celebrate every victory and commiserate every loss. Ellen was the one in the stands, flirting with anyone she could, not even knowing who we were playing or what the final score was.

“It’s going to be so great having you beside me,” Danny coos, smiling blinding white teeth that have clearly been bleached to the max.

“So…you two are…together?” I ask, the bitterness of my coffee catching in my throat.

“We are!” Ellen declares, flashing her own too-white smile and giggling. Good to know her giggle still grates on my nerves, even ten years after I’ve heard it.

“Wow, congratulations. That must be a fairly new development,” I reply. You know, considering she was trying to hook up with Rueben yesterday afternoon and Danny made no mention of Ellen last night at Slim’s.

“We ran into each other last night in the hotel bar and got to reminiscing. The attraction is there, right? I mean, he’s Danny freaking Ohara,” Ellen boasts, waving her hand in front of the man at her side like she’s Vanna White.

I can’t help it, I roll my eyes. Really big like. So wide, I’m sure I catch a glimpse of my brain as my eyes are swirling around in my head. I try not to make a big showing of it, but I know Ellen saw. The glare is intense, and if I were a weaker woman, I would have definitely cowered under her stare, but I have years under my belt, covering Ellen’s disapproval and less than sunny disposition.

Our waitress returns to take our orders, but I’m not sure I can eat much. Watching Danny and Ellen maul each other at the table is doing a number on my stomach. Even Rueben seems a little grossed out by the PDA our tablemates are putting on.

“So, Ellen, what have you been up to since graduation?” I ask, hoping that they’ll stop licking each other long enough to have a conversation, even if I’d rather do anything other than talk to them.

“Oh!” she starts eagerly. “I moved to Chicago after graduation and worked for WKN as an intern. I did that for about six weeks and met Rodney. He was the CEO for the station. We got married about four months later in Aruba,” she says with bright eyes.

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