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He smiled at me, “We could’ve brought a cot in. We don’t really like to have more than one person per bed.”
“Sorry.”
He smiled, “Good news Stella, your blood work is clear.”
Jamie looks up at him. A relieved look appears on his face, “She’s going to be okay?”
“Yes. Do you have questions, Stella?”
“How long do we have to wait until we try again?”
“You should really wait a couple of cycles. Remember, it will be harder to get pregnant with just one ovary and one fallopian tube.”
Jamie looks like he’s seen a ghost. He looks so pale. It’s not the reaction I expected. I thought he wanted kids with me.
“When can I leave?”
“Your vitals have been good. Your infection is gone. So soon. However, you need to follow up with your family doctor and your gynecologist.”
I’m all smiles. I’m going to live. As scary as this was for Jamie, it was also scary for me. There’s something about nearly dying that makes you so grateful for life. Jamie does not look so happy. The doctor leaves and Jamie is running his hands through his hair. I know he does this when he’s upset.
“Jamie?”
He looks at me with an anger in his eyes that I have never seen, “Are you out of your fucking mind?”
“What?” I said.
“You must have lost your damn mind if you think I’m getting you pregnant again. I’ll wrap it five times if I have to.”
“You don’t want children?”
“No, I don’t.”
“What? You were happy?”
“I was happy before I realized it could kill you. I’m not risking it, Stella. I don’t care if we ever have sex again. It’s not that good.”
“The sex isn’t good?”
“Stella, the sex is wonderful. I love being with you, but it’s not worth losing you over. Maybe we can do other things instead.”
“You need to call your brother. You’re being ridiculous.”
“Ridiculous? You almost died. I nearly lost you forever.”
“But to never have sex again?”
“I’m not risking it Stella.”
“Jamie, just because this was ectopic doesn’t mean the next would be, and I’ll see a doctor immediately.”
“No babies, Stella. I’m sorry.”
“Jamie, I want a baby. Losing this one made me realize I want to be a mother.”
“I don’t want a baby that bad. I’d rather have you.”
“Maybe we can talk about this again when it’s not so fresh.”
