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“Did she make you come?”
“It was just sex, Stella. It meant nothing.”
“I’ll take that as a yes. Show me a picture.”
“Stella.”
“Show me a picture, Jamie. I want to see what she looks like.”
“Are you trying to torture yourself or me?”
She stands with her arms crossed, waiting.
I pull it up on facebook and show her the damned picture.
“Oh, now I get it. She’s beautiful and blonde.”
“You’re far more beautiful.”
“That must be how you ended up coming inside of her, because I’m so beautiful.”
“Stella, I thought you were fucking him. I thought I’d lost you. I’m sorry, I wish it never happened.”
“How many women have you fucked while we were together, Jamie?”
“Only one.”
“Oh, good, you only cheated on me with one person. How many times Jamie?”
“Jesus Stella, it was the one time.”
“That’s supposed to make me feel better, I suppose.”
She walks over to the bulletin board we have for writing, signaling she’s done with the conversation. She will not forgive me. I’ve lost her and now I have to sit in a room with her for God only knows how long.
“Stella, what can I do to make you forgive me?”
“Nothing. I will never forgive you, Jamie. Do you know what you’ve done? I kept myself guarded for so long to prevent this. I finally let someone in. I let you in and you broke my heart almost immediately. Nobody tells you that a broken heart actually physically hurts. I won’t give you another chance to do this again. I will never make this mistake again. Never! No one will ever hurt me again.”
I pulled her into my arms and whispered in her ear, “Stella, I love you. Please forgive me. Don’t let this end. Please try to understand what I was going through.”
I could feel her heartbeat increasing.
“You’re everything to me, Stella. Everything. I will do anything.”
“Did you use a condom?”
“Of course I did.”
“Why Jamie why?”
“I’m an idiot. I thought it would make me feel better.”
“Did it?”
“No.”
“Did you kiss her?”
