Page 85 of Just Shred


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“What?” he asks, giving me pleading eyes and kissing a trail up my neck, stopping at the corner of my mouth.

Damn his mouth. His lips make me forget why I was truly considering his offer with him in the first place. And that soft drawl plays with my heart and mind to the point where I’m actually debating his crazy proposition.

“Hold up, snowboard guy,” I say, pushing him away from me.

“Why?” He pouts. “I was having fun.”

“You’re not actually serious?” I gasp, staring at him.

“About this, yeah,” he growls, running both hands through his hair. “I’m serious like a fucking nosebleed… maybe not my best reference. You are killing me, Ace of Spades,” he drawls, brushing both his hands over his face and staring at the ceiling.

I stand and walk to the record player to change the song. Anything to keep myself busy. I smile when Ramble On fills the room. He drapes his arm over the armrest, gray eyes roaming my face. “Why are you still running, babe, when I know what you want?”

“How do you know what I want? When I don’t even know myself.” I ask and stare out the window, looking at the lights in the distance, illuminating the night sky from where the lifts go up on the mountain.

“We all want to belong to someone. I can’t give you much, but maybe I can convince you with my dick.” He snickers, and I flip him off, shaking my head.

“You know how hard I tried to run away from this place, Jesse?” I ask, turning to him.

He nods, watching me intently as I start pacing in front of the window. “Meeting you on that mountain—” I say, pointing to the mountains and the starry sky above them.

“Was fate or whatever the hell it was. But this is also where my life is; I’m never leaving this place, babe,” he tells me, and I want to wipe that smug smile from his face. Because everything he said is true. I want to experience it all.

“I know, Jess, and that’s what pisses me off,” I say and stop walking. “I grew up in this town. I loved it here, but it all went to shit when my brother died. And even after everything that’s been said between my family, I can’t forgive myself.”

He nods, his gray eyes roaming my face. “I didn’t know him, but he was a legend on the mountain. His movies were the ones keeping me on my board when I wanted to walk away from this life. I once thought about quitting right after a disastrous Dew Tour, but then Ben showed me some footage of Ronnie’s stunts, and I didn’t want to quit. I wanted to become as good as he was,” he tells me, his voice soft. “Why I didn’t see the resemblance before, I don’t know.”

I stare at him, dazed. “He was a force to be reckoned with,” I whisper, leaning against the armrest. “He basically raised me. He was my best friend, and I let him down.”

“Is that why you ran? Because everything reminds you of him?” he rasps.

I nod, wiping at my face, and the tears barreling down it.

“Babe,” he says, standing and taking my hands in his. “No one makes us get up on a mountain and do what we do. It calls to us. It’s freedom some search for their entire lives. But you need perseverance and trust in yourself to do the shit I do, what he did.”

“Why can’t you just ride the half pipe and be done with it?” I grumble. I know I’m losing steam. Snowboard guy keeps drawing me in with his pretty face and sweet-talking one-liners.

He cocks his head to the side. “I love the pipe because I’m fucking good at it. I love doing and learning new tricks. Figuring shit out together with my coach, traveling the world for competitions,” he says, reaching out and caressing my cheeks between his hands. “But the mountain is where my heart is.”

“Why?” I ask. “When you know it can take everything from you.”

He lets me go. “Because I want to be the fucking best,” he says, his voice rough. “And yes, as I’m dropping down or doing a run in the pipe and turn twenty feet in the air, I can easily break my neck against the ice, but the fear will never hold me back. It’s my fuel,” he tells me and sits on the armrest, propping his Vans on the table between us. “But when I’m riding back country, or in Canada at Baldface, I come alive, and I’m one with the mountain. That’s what I live for.”

“The ride,” I whisper, briefly closing my eyes, listening to the crackle of the fireplace.

“Yeah, the ride,” he says, and there is a fire reflected in his eyes. I’m never going to be enough for him. I can’t fall for someone who chooses white powder over me. “I can’t promise to wait for you,” I whisper and shake my head. It makes no sense, my feelings for him. Not when he’s going to be gone, and I’ll be here piecing my broken heart together. Or maybe he has been doing that without me knowing? I don’t know.

I stand and lean my hands against the mantel, letting the flames of the fire warm me. This is stupid. I’m stupid for fantasizing about a life with a man who doesn’t want to be tied down.

He hugs me from behind, and I sway in his arms, loving how he holds me. “Give me a chance, babe. Let’s figure it out,” he murmurs in my ear.

He turns me around and lifts me up, grabbing my ass with his hands. He sits back down on the couch, and I wrap my arms around his neck. With trembling fingers, I push his hair back, and he winces.

“Are you okay?” I ask, trailing my fingers over his chest.

He grabs my hand. “I’ll be okay, don’t worry about me,” he says, while I stare at the bruises peeking out from under his shirt. His jaw tenses and his eyes are ablaze. I can’t keep up with his emotions. On the one hand, he says he doesn’t want anything from me, but then he catches my stare with that wild possessive look in his eyes, and I can’t help but think he might actually like me.

“What do you want from me, snowboard guy?” I whisper, my mouth an inch away from his.

“Enough to change your mind,” he drawls, his hands traveling under my shirt and up my spine. Reaching the opening of my bra, he grins. “I love the lace, Ace,” he says, trailing his fingers over the clasp.

I lean back and study his face, his eyes, the stubble covering his chiseled jaw.

“What if I asked you to follow me around the world to watch me ride. Would you do that?” he asks.

I bite on the inside of my cheek. The talk with my dad and brother really helped me, but getting involved with a snowboarder, and one who is still at the beginning of his career, is scary as fuck. He’s twenty-one; he can easily have ten more years chasing gold medals all around the world. Not to mention the movies and sponsorship deals he’s going to be part of. He doesn’t need someone like me. Being back in Aspen, the home I tried to run away from for so long, has made one thing clear. Maybe it’s time for me to stay.

“Think about it, Ace,” he whispers, grabbing the back of my neck, going in for a searing hot kiss. It turns more demanding with the stroke of his tongue. When I come up for air, we are both panting hard.

“Where is the bedroom in this overpriced shindig?” he husks out, his fingers digging into my waist. “Because I’m going to fuck you, babe, the whole damn night.”

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