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“Yeah, I know. Jack meant to fix it. Just like everything else he meant to do. Let me guess, fixing that door so his baby girl doesn’t get her fingers amputated, that was on his list, right?”
“That would never happen! I would never let that happen,” Maggie cried out. “You know sometimes things just get away from a person. He means well … he tries. He does.”
“He’s been gone three weeks, Maggie. Three goddamn weeks without a word. How often does this happen?” Prosper asked. The muscle in his jaw leapt and his biceps tightened as he crossed his arms over his chest.
Maggie gave Prosper a hard look, then let out a long sigh.
“Does it matter?”
“Hell yeah, it matters, Maggie.”
“He’ll be back. He always comes back …” she began to say as she looked at him helplessly to confirm.
“No, I don’t fucking know.” Prosper shook his head. “I don’t know how a man can leave his woman and baby to go on a damn joy ride.”
Maggie remained silent, but her brow furrowed while her hands twisted in her lap. “You want coffee? I can make a pot of coffee, and there’s some of that cake left from yesterday.” Maggie got up from the table, clearly wanting the conversation to be over.
Prosper stood up and barred her way because things had to be said.
And heard.
“Jack left his wife and his baby daughter in a rundown farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, with an empty refrigerator, a car with a bone-dry gas tank, and four bald tires. Nothing’s been done here since I left. And it’s serious shit that hasn’t been done, Maggie. Dangerous shit. Like that door, and that cracked window. We’re clear on that, right?”
“We’re clear,” Maggie said quietly.
Prosper wanted to shake her. “Then, if you know, why the hell would you put up with that kind of bullshit?”
“Jack is not as handy as you are, Prosper. I guess his priorities are different … I don’t know … A man needs his space sometimes.” She bit her lower lip and began to twist her hands again.
“Damn, Maggie, are you defending him?” Prosper knew he was upsetting her, but he was just as upset thinking that she would put up with Jack’s irresponsible bullshit. “What’s it gonna take for you to get your head out of your ass? Christ, all you have to do is open your goddamn eyes to see that—”
“My god! Will you stop? Will you juststop?” Maggie cried out in anguish. “When I realized it was you riding up that road, I was so happy! So damn happy! But all you’ve been doing since you got here is finding fault. With Jack … and with me too! What do you want me to do? To say? That I made a bet on the wrong horse? Struck a lousy deal? Played the wrong card? Because that’s what Jack was for me, that’s what this is for me, Prosper. One big giant gamble.”
“Jesus, Maggie.” He moved towards her, but she stepped back and waved him away with an angry hand.
“You saw. You saw my life back there.” Her voice was shaking now, and her eyes were bright with unshed tears. “So now I’m gonna ask you, just how many choices did you think I had? Either I lived and died on that reservation or I took a chance on a man who was willing to take a chanceon me. And I took it. I took that chance. You were with us for months. Months, Prosper! And not once … not once … did you step up and give me any other choice. You left without giving me any other choice.”
Prosper looked at her, shocked. “You were in love with him.”
“Oh, you big, stupid,stupidjackass! I was in love with you too!” she shouted at him. Prosper stepped back as if she had struck him.
“Was?” His voice barely above a whisper, “Was?”
Maggie looked at Prosper knowing that this was the moment.
This was it.
It was the moment that could change everything.
It was the speak-now-or-forever-hold-your-peace kind of moment.
“Am,” she told him. “Iamin love with you, Prosper. I was then and I am now. And I will always and forever wish you had stepped up when you could have, but you didn’t. And now you can’t … and I can’t. There’s a baby girl and this little house and a man who, despite what you might think, does his best to love us. I won’t—I can’t leave him. But I can’t stop loving you. I can’t stop looking down that road for you. I can’t stop wishing for you, Prosper. And having those feelings? I am doing the best, the very best I can to live without you. So, don’t you … don’t you dare ride in here after all this time and think you can talk about a broken screen door or a cracked window. You want to talk about men who leave? Look in the damn mirror. And until you do, don’t you dare say another word about Jack.”
They stood looking at each other in that kitchen for what seemed like forever. It was only when a loud clap of thunder sounded out and Raine began to cry did either one of them so much as blink. Then Maggie moved away from Prosper and walked with a straight back and a heavy heart down the hall to comfort her child.
Maggie sat in that rocking chair long after Raine had fallen asleep. She stayed in that room while the storm built up strength and began to flash its lightening and batter at the window with heavy drops of rain. After a long while, she heard the door slam, the rumble of a motorcycle turn over, and the sound of tires spitting up gravel as it rode away into the storm.
Well, that’s that.Maggie sighed and wondered how this could be … still be … her fate. How many times had she sat up on that tin rooftop and promised herself that she would do better, be better, choose better.
