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“Here ya go, Cammy bear, I’m sure you need this.” He pours me a shot, then slides it across the table to me.
“Oh, Harvey,” Mom chastens, swatting his arm. She throws her napkin on the table, slides her chair back, and stands, disappearing into the kitchen.
Dad pours himself and Spencer a shot, but neither of us touches it, not until Mom returns with her small bamboo cutting board, a bottle of pink salt, a couple of limes, and a knife.
“We can at least drink the correct way,” she says, reclaiming her spot and begins cutting a lime into four slices. Dad pours her a shot with a chuckle, then leans over and kisses the side of her head.
Mom passes us all a lime and the salt bottle, each of us licking the back of our hands and sprinkling it with salt. When we’re all prepared, we count to three, lick the salt from our hands and toss the shot back. I quiver at the taste of the warm liquid, then suck the lime wedge into my mouth to soothe the warmth that’s now floating in my belly.
“This was not the reaction that I was expecting,” I say, shaking my head and suppressing a laugh.
“Oh, sweetie, you know how much your father and I love you. If you have decided to leave Declan, we know you put thought into it, and it’s the best decision for you. We will always support anything you do.” Unwelcome tears sting my eyes.
This is my crazy supportive family. The same people who let me have the freedom to make my own decisions and own mistakes. The same people who didn’t question me when I ran off on tour with Declan and announced shortly after that I was pregnant and getting married.
My parents have always felt that Spencer and I need to make our own mistakes and learn from them. They’ve always said that you learn by doing, and they trust us enough to follow our hearts and do what we feel is right.
“Besides, we knew this was coming. Let’s be honest, your marriage hasn’t exactly been perfect. And this past year has exposed many flaws in the both of you,” Spencer chimes in, holding her glass out toward dad for him to refill it.
“One more. I’m not going to get my girls drunk,” dad says, looking from Spence, to me, and to Mom. We giggle in unison.
“Tell us more, Cammy bear. What do you need us to do?” dad asks.
I shake my head. “Nothing. Dec already moved back to New York. That’s where I was last week. We had a long talk, and we both decided it’s best that we part ways. No hard feelings. It’s the right thing for both of us.”
Mom sniffles. “You were so young when you got married. You both still had a lot of growing up to do. Sometimes, you grow together, and other times you grow apart. I’m proud of you for having the strength to make your marriage work and for letting go when you realize it would no longer work.” She reaches across to me and takes my hands in hers. “But please know that Declan is still a part of this family. Just because he’ll no longer be your husband doesn’t change the fact he’s family.” My parents have loved Declan from the moment they met him. He doesn’t have family, he comes from a toxic and abusive background, and the only people he had at the time were his bandmates.
My mom declared that he’s her son, and he’ll forever be part of our family. During his time in rehab, my parents spoke to him more than I did. Mom attended the weekly visits, taking him homemade meals and baked goods every week. She’s always had the biggest soft spot for him, so it doesn’t surprise me that she plans to keep in contact with him.
Of course, he’s still my family. Us divorcing isn’t going to change that. I know we’ll be better off as friends, and we’ve already promised to keep in contact. He’ll always have a piece of my heart and be a part of me.
After talking more with my parents about my decision and consuming more than the two-drink maximum that dad set, I agree to stay the night. Spence and I clean the kitchen after our parents go to sleep, making small talk as we clean.
As soon as we finish, we go upstairs to her room and bring the bottle of tequila with us.
Now, we lie in her queen bed in her childhood room, passing the bottle back and forth as we take sips.
“I’m sorry for how I acted that day at lunch. It wasn’t cool. You can always come to me and cry on my shoulder,” Spencer says with a dramatic sigh. “I love you, little sis, and I fucking hate when we fight and don’t speak.”
I giggle. “We never fight. I’m pretty sure that was our first actual fight ever.”
She giggles, taking the nearly empty bottle from my hands. “Yeah, but still. We have to stick together. If you haven’t noticed, you’re my bestest friend ever!”
With an uncontrollable giggle, I shove her shoulder playfully. “Shhh! We can’t wake them.”
“God, I feel like a kid again. Having to keep quiet, so we don’t wake the parentals.”
“Except this time, it’s me in your room and not a boy.”
“See, I knew it! I knew you were the one creeping around every time I snuck Dallas in. He’d say I was crazy whenever I heard something, saying that he didn’t hear anything.”
“It was totally me. You would sneak him in, then right after, I’d sneak out and go to Dean’s house.” I sigh, reminiscing on our childhood days. The days when the only thing I cared about was getting to see Dean and earning one of his smiles that made me feel like the most special girl in the entire world. His special smile is what I called it. The smile only directed toward me that made my stomach fill with butterflies every time I saw it.
“You really have always been in love with him,” Spencer says, now serious.
“Yeah, I have. I think that I always will be.”
“Camille, he’s married. I know you’re getting divorced, but what about him? You know you can’t carry on having an affair, right? Even if he says he’s leaving her, he hasn’t done it yet. If he loves you, then he’ll choose you. You deserve more than being someone’s dirty little secret. You’re worth more than being the other woman. The woman he fucks on the side before going home and playing house with his wife.”
