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Even more so than he was.
“We need to talk,” Rick said, his eyes glinted as he stared at me from across our dining table. “Something has to be said. Things are escalating real fucking quickly.”
I paused, my knife halfway through buttering my roll. My stomach tensed. “Couldn’t agree more. I’m more than happy to say something, Rick. In fact, I’m dying to fucking say something. It’s you who insisted on waiting six months.”
He looked blankly for a moment, then gave me a sigh. “Notthatsomething, I mean something betweenus.”
The disappointment panged. “What something between us?” I dipped the bread in my soup. Homemade a la Rick. Vegetable medley. “Things are fucking sweet, no?”
He nodded. “Yeah, they’re sweet. Sweet as fucking daisies.”
We both agreed on that. Another few days of Katie in our bed at night, another few days of Katie in my office through the day. A couple of days of Rick taking her to the stables while I finished up work.
A couple of days of fucking like fucking rabbits.
She was at home tonight, spending time with her mother. The first night in several, and it was quiet. So fucking quiet. She’d left a Katie-shaped hole in our life here, and it itched like a fucker when she was away.
I tried to convince myself it was always like this, that we always fell this hard. But it was bullshit. Total fucking bullshit.
“Spit it out, then,” I said. “What’s the problem?”
“The inevitability.” He stirred his soup. “Things are bound to happen, sooner or later.”
“Things? Whatthings?”
He shrugged. “You two at the office all day, for instance. Or me on stable-boy duty with the prettiest girl of all the time while you work late… someone’s gonna break, Carl.”
I stared at him. “We come together or not at all, that’s what we decided.”
He folded his arms. “And I’m saying it needs rethinking, it’s not sustainable.”
I hated to admit he was right. It’d been bothering me for a few days now, those lingering looks in the office, the hard-on in my pants as I watched Katie at her desk. The way I was jacking off in the toilets when it got too much.
“Are you saying you’re going to fuck her, Rick? A tumble in the hay, so to speak? Literally?”
“I’m not saying that.” He held up his hands. “Katie’s more into Samson at the yard than she is me, way fucking more. I’m just saying it’s a fuse waiting to spark, all ways round. Better to address it now, I think. Save a fucking hoo-hah down the line when someone fucks up.”
“So, what are you suggesting?”
He put his hands in his hair. “I’m not sure. Maybe just an option to call? Before it happens? For permission?”
“Like a courtesy call?I’m about to plough Katie’s tight little cunt over a hay bale, is that alright?”
“What would you say if I called you with that?”
“I was fucking joking, Rick.” I thought about it while I took another bite. “What could I say? I’d say yes, I guess. What else could I fucking say?”
He shrugged. “I’d say yes, too.” He smirked. “And then I’d want to listen.”
“It’s dangerous,” I said. “It’s always dangerous.”
“Yeah, I know.” He sighed. “Always a fucking minefield, Carl. I dunno why we put ourselves through it.” But he was smiling.
“We’re strong,” I said. “We’ll cope.”
He nodded. “I hope so.”
“Hope?”
