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I swallowed, and it felt like a rock was lodged in my esophagus. It should have come as a relief. It should have made my life easier knowing that in just under two years, I could be free of him and I would never have to worry about him taking my body. But already, things were too muddled between us. There was only one solution, and the simplest thing to do was push him away. Divine intervention helped me with that when Lucian set aside his torture device. He came back to sit beside me, but that didn’t matter. The other man took one glance at the sweaty sub on the floor and gestured for Lucian as he untied her.
“I’m done playing with her now. She wants you.”
“I’m not—”
“I want to watch you,” I interrupted.
Lucian’s fingers tightened around my thigh. The same fingers that had just wielded a whip with a skill that told me he’d been practicing for years. I knew this was a path we couldn’t come back from, but I needed to do this for my sanity. For my well-being. I needed to remind myself that Lucian was nothing to me, and in the end, I was better off alone.
“You want to watch me with her?” His voice was deceptively soft, and I didn’t trust it, but still, I forged on recklessly.
I nodded. “Yes. You said you would show me.”
“That wasn’t the agreement,” he pointed out.
“She said yes,” the sultry voice purred from across the room.
When I looked over, the naked girl was crawling toward us, her eyes burning with need for Lucian’s touch while jealousy burned deep in my gut. I wanted to extinguish it. I wanted to hate him, and after this, I would.
I returned my gaze to Lucian, but he’d never taken his eyes off me. “She might have said yes, but I didn’t.”
The girl didn’t listen. Instead, she kneeled before him, clinging to his shoes, and I locked my fists at my sides to keep from clawing her eyes out.
Lucian regarded me with an intensity that made me shiver. “This is what you wanted, pet?”
I nodded.
“You want to watch me fuck her?” he pushed.
Again, I nodded.
“You want to watch me kiss her, and punish her, and fill her with my come?”
I jerked my chin toward the ceiling, but it was stiffer this time. The girl didn’t seem to care that we were still having a conversation because she began to lap at his shoes with her tongue, and I was so close I could smell her arousal for him. It made me sick. It made me hate him even more. Tears burned the back of my eyes as he forced her chin up.
“Kneel,” he ordered.
She panted like a dog in heat as he fisted his cock through the material of his trousers. “Tell me what you want her to do, pet,” he ordered. “Be specific.”
I looked at the girl. She was pretty. The opposite of me with fairer skin and softer features, but I wondered if she was more Lucian’s type. And then I wondered if it had been her he’d thought of when he masturbated in the shower.
“What do you want her to do to me?” Lucian pondered. “She’ll do anything, won’t you?”
The girl nodded, and I didn’t miss the blatant dig at me. I wouldn’t do anything with him, but was that what he wanted? I didn’t know anymore. I was confused. I thought I wanted him to fuck her, so I could hate him, but I couldn’t stomach to watch it.
“Do you want her to suck my dick?” Lucian suggested. “Ride me? I could eat her out. Tell me, baby girl, what do you want to see?”
He was pushing me, and he knew it. He was also being an asshole, and he knew it. And I hated him so much for getting inside my head this way. The whole world was collapsing in on me, and I had no defenses against it.
I stood and tried to look brave. “I don’t care. You do whatever you want with her. You’re the twisted fuck, not me.”
I tried to leave, but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him. “You were so willing to lend me to her,” he said coldly. “What’s the problem, pet?”
“I don’t need to see it.”
“But you want it,” he insisted.
I shook my head. “You want it, so it’s what you should do. I can’t be this for you. I can’t let you do those things to me, and you know it.”
The blackness in his eyes melted away to a warm chocolate brown as he snagged my wrist and tugged me onto his lap. He pinched my face with his fingers, his lips a breath away. It looked like he was going to kiss me, and I found that I wanted him to, but I couldn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he forced my legs apart and dragged me forward until I could feel the throbbing heat of his dick through my panties. It was wrong, but I couldn’t make myself remember that.
