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“It’s not a bad sort of different.” Her gaze lingered on his unbuttoned shirt and the exposed wedge of his chest. Her cheeks bloomed with pink. “It’s interesting to see you when you’re not so starched and buttoned up.”
“Well, you look the same as always,” he said, matter-of-fact. “Beautiful. Devastating.”
“You’ve scarcely glanced at me.”
“It doesn’t matter. By now, I just know. You could be wrapped in a shroud on a moonless night, and I’d know.”
She knotted her fingers together. “Could we talk, perhaps? Somewhere with more seating and less broken pottery?”
“Yes, of course.” He was an idiot.
They went into the parlor. She took a seat on the divan. He headed for an armchair, but she patted the stretch of upholstery beside her. He couldn’t refuse.
“Your housekeeper was good enough to send in tea.” She poured out two cups, lightening his with a splash of milk before passing it to him. Exactly the way he took his tea. She didn’t even have to ask.
It was all so...normal. Unexceptional. Suddenly, they were like an old married couple.
No. Don’t think that way.
“I’m sorry to have burst in on you without any warning. I needed to speak with you, in case you were forming any rash ideas of defending my honor. My mother, I am happy to say, does not actually believe me to be a brazen hussy.”
“Then she must think me an unprincipled knave.”
“No. Believe it or not, somehow she already knew that you loved me.”
He couldn’t resist pointing it out. “You see? I told you it must be obvious to anyone.”
“She’s not anyone. She has some kind of oracle embedded in her eyebrow. It’s uncanny. You’ll learn.”
He’d learn? When? How? Why?
“She didn’t want anyone to know about our little assignation. That’s why she wouldn’t allow you to speak to Papa. It would have forced me to accept you, and she believed I should have a choice.”
“Your mother was right. I was a jackass, truly.”
She sipped her tea. “We were neither of us exemplars of behavior last night. But the important thing is that no one thinks me a scheming seductress, and she won’t tell anyone what happened, and so you needn’t come to my father and brothers to fall on your sword or offer yourself for target practice.”
“It is some relief that to know I won’t be shot today.” He drained his cup. “That would be the worst sort of Christmas.”
“For us both.” She confronted his gaze. “Justin, why did you never say anything, in all those months?”
He settled into the divan. Somehow it was easy to speak about it this morning. Maybe the daylight banished the melodrama, or perhaps the quotidian ritual of tea put it into perspective. He was grateful to unburden himself.
“I know it must sound absurd, but I genuinely thought there was no need. I spent an inordinate amount of time in your company. I thought my admiration to be obvious. When you began to tease and provoke me, I was idiot enough to mistake it for flirtation on your part. Encouragement.”
“That is an understandable assumption, I suppose.”
“You made attempts to engage me in conversation. When we conversed, you shared your thoughts freely. I saw it as a compliment that you would entrust me with your honest opinions. I strove to repay that compliment, even when we disagreed.”
“That makes a distressing amount of sense.”
“My hovering about, my beholding you with admiration... Those we have addressed. I didn’t realize my manner might seem critical or intimidating. That is a flaw in my character, and I shall own it. I’m not accustomed to concerning myself with how I appear to others.”
“I imagine most earls likely aren’t. Nor dukes, marquesses, or viscounts for that matter.”
“And then last night. The party. That abominable vest. You told me it was a tradition among gentlemen of the family. When you made an effort to include me in it, I hoped...”
He paused, letting the full weight of his idiocy settle on her.
