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Several fans pressed into her personal space, wanting their time with a celebrity. She could see disappointment in his eyes at being pushed aside so quickly. She sent him an apologetic look. "See you later,Peter."
Within minutes, dozens of well-wishers surrounded her, anxious to take her picture with them or get her autograph. By the time the crowd was starting to thin out, she was exhausted. Only then did she look down at the small plate of desserts and realize she'd only taken a few bites. Guilt gnawed at her. Yet the hunger had begun to feel like her old, dark friend, seducing her back into an almost anorexic existence. She was skating close to the edge of her safe zone, flirting with a darkness she'd thought she'd kicked yearsago.
Strong arms enveloped her from behind, hugging her back tight against a masculine, hard chest. "I've missed you, baby. You almost ready to head back to thehotel?"
Dean made sure to grind his hips forward enough to demonstrate that his appendage had indeed missed her. Instead of turning her on, Khloe fought the urge to laugh. So much had changed since the last time she'd slept with Dean. They'd never been in love, but they'd had an amicable romance. But that had been before his cheating with Gloria. Andbefore...
Christ, memories of the most sexual night of her life slammed into her, drawing a full body tremble that a conceited Dean took as a green-light from her to slip a hand higher, brushing her breast in a brave display in the middle of the grand foyer. Of course he had no way of knowing that the woman he held in his arms had slipped into her favorite pastime–dreaming of a sex-god named RyderHelms.
Ryder had begun to feel like a mirage to her. A figment of her imagination. Or maybe an actor who'd had too small of a role in her life before being written out of the script. That a man she'd only known for three hours of her life could consume her thoughts at a moment’s notice frankly had begun to piss heroff.
Khloe used her confusing anger to wrench herself out of Dean's arms. She turned on him, prepared to tell him exactly what she thought about his offer when she caught sight of cameras pointed in their direction. Instead, she leaned in close, giving the illusion of intimacy as she replied, "Tonight changes nothing, Dean. We're done. I'll play my part in front of the cameras, but you're nuts if you think I'm going back to the hotel withyou."
He didn't seem surprised. "Oh, come on. I'm only talking about having a little fun. Don't be such a prude. Gloria and Daniel are coming over. You'll have a good time. Ipromise."
Considering she hadn't had sex since Valentine's Day, she had to admit she was briefly tempted, but in the end, she knew she'd just end up disappointed with Dean's watered down version of intimacy. She'd caught a glimpse of the real thing with Ryder, and she was certain Dean Reynolds would be a poor substitute. The problem was, Ryder was a figment of her imagination and she didn't have the first damn clue how to go about finding him or even another man like him. Unexpected tears pricked her eyes at the reminder of herloss.
The room was suddenly too warm. Too closed in. She needed to get out of there. She'd stayed longenough.
Khloe yanked herself out of Dean's clutches, searching the room frantically for Trevor. Or Ricky. Hell, she'd even take the Kaplans, but she couldn't spy any of them. She reached for her small purse and pulled out her phone, texting Johnson and asking him to bring her car around before shooting off a text to Trevor to meet her at the door with her furshawl.
Dean shouted after her as she turned to leave. He pulled her to a stop long enough to thrust a magnetic keycard into her hand before leaning in to whisper in her ear, "Don't be like this, Khloe. I promise. I'll make it good for you. Room 1232. We'll be waiting for you,baby."
Their eyes met long enough for her to see his smug confidence. It didn't dawn on him that she'd refuse their offer for a debauched night of swinging. Memories of another debauched night in her life were crowding in fast. She needed to be alone. She could feel a familiar tug of temptation. Ofloneliness.
She was relieved to see Trevor waiting for her near the door. She was stopped a few times by well-wishers, but finally reached him just as she looked out the glass doors to see Johnson pulling up in front of the theater. It was raining harder now and he exited the driver's seat to hold open the back door, an umbrella held high meant to protect her and her gown from gettingdrenched.
She and Trevor made a dash from under the awning of the theater, diving into the back seat as quickly as possible. She didn't truly relax until the limo was in motion. Khloe collapsed against the rich leather seat, exhausted. Keeping up her public facade was work on a normal day. Dealing with being the center of attention and Dean's unexpected appearance had taken every ounce of her mental tenacity. She was grateful that both Trevor and Johnson had been with her long enough to understand she needed the silence of the car in that moment more than anythingelse.
She was starting to feel more like herself as they pulled up into the carport of The Plaza. When the doorman opened the door next to her, shefroze.
"Come on, Khloe. Let's get youupstairs."
"No," she countered. "I want to gohome."
Trevor tried to reason with her. "We've already paid for the suite through tomorrow, you know. And all of your stuff is stillupstairs."
"I don't care. I want to sleep in my own bed tonight. You can come back over and pick up my stufftomorrow."
She kept her face as passive as possible. She didn't want to share her main reason for wanting to go home was because she didn't trust herself not to use the electronic keycard still clutched in her palm. She knew she would hate herself if she let her loneliness and hunger for intimacy drive her to suite 1232. She'd never find those things there. She'd only find a shallow replica, and she wasn't willing to put herself through thatdisappointment.
Trevor had waited, hoping she'd change her mind. When he accepted she wouldn't, he pulled the door closed and Johnson took off, pointing the limo in the direction of her apartment in Chelsea, less than fifteen minutesaway.
Raindrops streaked down the window, taunting her. Tonight was supposed to be one of the best nights of her life, and in some ways, it had been. So why was it getting harder to repress her tears. She swallowed often, hoping to hold it together until she wasalone.
She was relieved when they pulled up in front of her apartment building and the night doorman met them, holding open her door. Trevor got out first, taking the large umbrella and helping Khloe out next. She lifted her long gown, trying to avoid the hem from getting too wet as they dashed into thelobby.
"Thanks, Trevor. I'll talk to you tomorrow." For some unknown reason, she felt an overwhelming urge to be alone, even from her friend andbodyguard.
He grinned. "Aren't you forgetting something?" When she didn't answer, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a key ring. "You don't have your set of keys with you. You might want to sleep in your apartment instead of on the couch here in thelobby."
That made her smile and eased her tension while he escorted her to the door of her 23rdfloor luxury apartment. He unlocked her door and swept inside first, taking the time to turn on several lights and look around the main living space, making sure everything was in order. Not for the first time, Khloe was grateful to have Trevor in her inner circle, protecting her from thecrazies.
He started to head down the hall towards her bedroom, but she stopped him. "It's okay. I wasn't even supposed to be here tonight so I'm sure no one is lurking in the off chance I'd dropby."
Trevor hesitated, looking less sure about aborting his inspection of her apartment, but finally turning back toher.
"You want me to sleep on the couch?" he offered. He'd done that before when he'd escorted her to events in NYC. He didn't have an apartment here like he did inCalifornia.
