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“But you’re ambitious and will leave one day, Tegan. He won’t wait for you. I’ve seen all this before. The guys in the band. Broken-hearted girls.”
“Right. You saying you’re going to do that to Avery?” I point at her.
“No! I was never like that and —”
“Why not trust Jax?” I interrupt.
“Oh, come on, Tegan! Look at him. His reputation. He’s another Dylan or Jem in the making.”
“Who have girlfriends now.”
“When they were Jax’s age, they had one a night!”
“Well, I trust him and isn’t that what matters?” I retort.
A loud sigh comes from Avery’s direction. “I’m going to finish getting ready to go out, you two should talk rationally.” She heads out of the kitchen.
The flood of emotion I’ve walled over the last two days spills, and the tears start. In front of my brother. Great.
His eyes widen and he steps forward. “Fuck! Don’t cry!”
I heave in a breath. “Why do you have to treat me like this?”
“Because I want to protect you.”
“Well, you can’t! I might meet a so-called normal guy in New York, and he could rip my heart out. Are you going to chaperone me for the rest of my life?” I swipe away a tear.
“No.”
“Then stay out of my life! I won’t do something just because you want me to!”
“So you’re not going to the States.”
“No!”
“And Jax?”
“I don’t know! You’ve confused everything. We barely had a chance to start and this shit comes up!”
“Jax showed his true colours, though.”
“What? By telling me he loved me?”
Avery reappears. “I think you both need to calm down and talk about this later.”
“Yeah, you tell him what an arsehole he’s being!” I say.
Our referee stands between us; a look Avery throws at Bryn silences him and he mutters something under his breath before turning and stomping out of the room. I’m amused by the fact a girl a foot shorter than Bryn can boss him around. Avery wrinkles her nose. “Wow. Okay.”
“Yeah. Good luck with havingthatin your life!”
44
JAX
Two weeks without Tegan and the hole she left in my world won’t fill. Tour over, the band switches to working on the album. I misdirect my emotions into music rather than contact Tegan. I fucked up, and she obviously doesn’t forgive me, or she’d call. The morning after my spectacular, drunken screw up, I texted and asked if we could talk. Her reply was she needed some space.
I know exactly what those words mean.
