AllFreeNovel
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“I think a conversation is long overdue.”
Jax swigs from his bottle. “I was heading for some fresh air to cool down. You can join me outside or wait until I come back inside?”
“I’ll come with you.”
We head to the rear of the venue and Jax pushes open the heavy fire exit doors. “I used to come out here and smoke.”
“Gross.”
“Yeah, things have changed a bit since then.”
A couple of old metal chairs rest in a corner surrounded by discarded cigarette butts. I wrinkle my nose and rest against the wall instead.
Jax stands opposite me, the space between remains uncrossed. “Sorry I never got in touch before. I didn’t know what to say. I mean, I wanted to call but didn’t want to upset you.”
“I should’ve got in touch too, but I wanted a clean break. Those few days at the end of the tour were a nightmare.”
“Yeah. Sorry. About all the shit with you going away, and for hitting the guy.” He pulls a face. “I learned my lesson. Maybe too late.”
“I’m here, aren’t I?”
“I meant what I said that night.” He turns his eyes to mine. “About what I felt. Feel. Nothing’s changed. I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you, whatever you decide to do after tonight. You never forget the first person you love, do you?” My heart stutters at his words as Jax steps closer. He touches my face. “I should’ve grown a pair and called you instead of living in this limbo for weeks.”
I smile at his expression. “I would’ve called but couldn’t cope with how you treated me or what you might say. I didn’t think I meant enough to you.”
“You don't get it, Tegan. The day I saw you in the hotel corridor in Lisbon, you blew me apart in just a few moments. Then you walked away with the pieces, and I had to fight your brother so I could get them back from you. All I wanted was for you to share some of yourself too.”
“You know I did, Jax. But when I fell in love with you, my life turned into a bizarre circus. Everything became too hard.”
He drops his hand and curls his fingers around mine. “Life's hard being in love?”
“Isn't it?”
He moves closer and holds my face in both hands. “Loving you is the easiest thing in my life. Or it was until things became complicated. In the midst of the chaos around those few weeks I had you.”
For the first time in weeks, Jax’s mouth is close to mine. The salty scent from his performance melds with his soap; the familiar scent of the man I fell in love with. I swallow, staring at his mouth. My body will override everything; the passion between us was always at the fore.
“You hurt me,” I whisper. “I —” Jax interrupts as his lips meet mine. I grab his hands as they close over my cheeks, expecting him to overwhelm me, but Jax kisses softly, the way he did the first time. The days drop away as if we last shared ourselves yesterday.
Jax rests his forehead on mine, heat radiating from his skin and for a moment, we don’t speak. Music inside the venue thuds through the half-open door; but out here, we’re away from everything, watched only by the stars fighting through the clouds.
“I love you. We can fix this,” he murmurs.
My aching heart explodes into need, and I thread my fingers into Jax’s hair. I crash my mouth on his, and kiss him the way I want to. Hot. Hard. Completely. The heat combusts between us, fuelled by the passion that connects our souls. I wrap myself against his hard body, craving his taste and touch. Jax kisses along my neck and rests his lips against my pulse point before moving back to my mouth. I untangle my hands from Jax’s hair and push them beneath his shirt, gripping the hard muscles of his back.
“I love you,” I whisper against his mouth. “I want us.”
His warm breath strokes my skin as he brushes hair from my face. “Are you still leaving?”
I frown at his sudden shift in conversation. Are we back to square one? “I haven’t decided. Tina needs to know by the end of the week.”
Jax is quiet for a moment. “I don’t care if you go to New York. Go to the moon if you want but however far you are, you’ll have a part of me with you. If you want me.”
“I don’t want anybody else but you, but I need to be me. You can have me, but you can’t have every part.”
“I want you to be you, too. You’re bloody incredible, Tegan Hughes.”
I smile. “I know, that’s how I caught Jax Lewis.”
