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Tonight’s going to be interesting.
* * *
An hour later, I hang around between the front barriers and the edge of the stage, as the stadium slowly fills. When I approached, security was on the brink of shoving me away until I flashed them my pass. One man gave me a curt nod and spoke to the burly guy threatening to put his hands on me. The second guy’s stance softened and he nodded too. Now, I sit on the edge of the barrier chatting to head of security, Mac, about his experiences on tour with Blue Phoenix. Mac’s from Newcastle, and toured with the band since the early days. He’s moved up the ranks from hired muscle to chief of the hired muscle, as integral to the tour as any PR guy or manager. Crew cut, muscle-bound, and with an aura telling those around he means business; he’s definitely somebody I need onside.
As I wait, the venue fills, and I watch the groups mill about, reserving their spot on the floor as they stand and chat. There’s a real mix of people: groups of chattering teen girls, a middle-aged couple and a quiet and serious looking group of guys. I guess there’s no such thing as an average Blue Phoenix fan; their music permeates the world.
Two girls in Ruby Riot t-shirts stare at me and I grin; I have pride of place in my position close to the stage. I’ve never been important before; I’ll stay here and make the most of my VIP status.
* * *
JAX
Pre-performance alcohol has never been more tempting, but never such a bad idea.
Opening Blue Phoenix’s European tour is a huge honour but terrifying. Okay, we moved on from dingy pubs and clubs to larger venues when we toured under Jem’s guidance last year, but never a stadium. Only tonight, when I saw the size of the place did the reality hit home. Thousands of people.Tens ofthousands. The largest place we played last year had around three hundred.
I steer clear of Ruby until I have to talk to her; she’s never personable before gigs. Quiet after the drama this afternoon, she at least looks better. Ruby never has a lot of colour in her face, but her eyes are brighter. I expected Jem to be around; but Ruby informed me she’d told him to stay away and needed to do this without him hovering.
Suits me.
Will and Nate go through their pre-show ritual, a lot of jostling and piss-taking of each other. They extend the joking to me, but they learned long ago to leave Ruby alone.
The twins are happy to indulge in a couple of pre-show drinks, their nervous energy increased by the beer as they charge up and down the hallway like big kids. At one point, the pair plays their bizarre twin ‘word game’ that involves shouting, dares, and more beer. At one point, Will runs past waving Nate’s jeans yelling something indecipherable. I gave up figuring out their secret signals and language years ago.
Fuck knows what they’ll be like at the after party.
“Big kids,” says Ruby as she appears from the dressing room.
“We are kids. You’re spending too much time with the new, serious Jem.”
Ruby adjusts the strap on her black cherry-printed halter dress. “Don’t start on Jem again.”
I want to say to her that less than two months ago he ripped her heart out, and ask how she could forgive him, but I don’t. Ruby has her combat boots on and she wears those on days she means business. Days you don’t want to piss her off.
“How you feeling about tonight?” she asks.
“Bloody terrified.”
Ruby nods. “Me too, but we’ll be fucking awesome.”
I admit my biggest fear. “I’m worried people only came for Phoenix, and won’t be interested in us.”
“Seriously, Jax? They fucking love you!”
Last night, at the club, reinforces Ruby’s words, but I don’t mean chicks. I don’t want to be the pretty boy guitarist who’s looked down on by established musicians because I appeal to the teens; I want to be known for my talent. Not that I’m complaining about the girls — perk of the job.
“Yeah. I guess.” I shake my hands out and take deep breaths. “What time is it?”
Ruby pulls a face to indicate she doesn’t know.
“Five minutes.” The stage manager, Barry, hold his palm up, fingers spread out and my stomach lurches.
As I step toward the stage door to take a look at the crowd, Ruby grabs my arm. “Don’t. You’ll feel worse.”
“Will! Nate!” I turn and yell. When there’s no response, I yell again.
