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“Our parents. They solved a lot of problems together in Chicago in their day. And they were already planning on helping with the demon. They may be somewhere else, but they’re researching a way to get back. To reverse what was done.”
“Yeah,” she said, frowning as she considered it. “Yeah,” she said again, this time more sure. “And the Librarian, Paige, the guards. Everyone. They’ll all be working on it.”
That seemed to lighten her mood, even as it depressed mine further. Everyone I loved was either at this table or totally unreachable.
“Maybe it’s Candy Land.”
We all looked at Alexei.
“What?” Lulu asked.
“Maybe they’re in Candy Land. Or a world made of steak frites, theirs for the taking.”
“Dad would like that,” I said. “Mom would prefer deep dish and chocolate.”
“Does she still have that drawer in the kitchen?” Connor asked. “The chocolate drawer?”
“Yep. At least, she did the last time I was in there.”
Connor smiled. “You’d want, what, a world of coffee?”
“And good boots,” I said, trying for a smile. “Lulu wants a giant art supply store. You want custom bike parts as far as the eyecan see.” I looked at Alexei. “You’d want a refrigerator that never empties.”
“Accurate,” Connor said. “All the way around.”
“We’ll get the asshole demon,” Lulu said, clearly trying to make herself believe it. “And we’ll see what wishes she cangrant.”
FOURTEEN
The sun rose and set again. And even with the beginning of a new night, everything seemed wrong. Off. Tilted and unbalanced. I didn’t know if that sensation was the working of the chaos demon, or just the fact that sometimes life was a pile of hot, buttered garbage. That was life, for better or worse.
So I ran away.
Running through the neighborhood in the dark, with the half-moon shining above me and the city mostly quiet, had become something I actually looked forward to. Because I had to concentrate on my speed, my breath, the inevitable gaps and cliffs in Chicago’s frost-heaved sidewalks, it helped me clear my head of worries.
I was nearly a mile from the town house when the rain started—a soft mist that quickly turned to a downpour.
Maybe it would be a cleansing rain. Maybe it would wash away the dregs of demon magic, the shards of glass, the bloodstains. But it wouldn’t bring Cadogan House back again. I still had no idea what would.
I was drenched by the time I made it home again and trudged back up the stairs. This time, running hadn’t made me feel better. I didn’t feel anything, really. I felt numb; grief was a weight that pulled me down, stripped me bare. I felt aimless and hopeless...and guilty, I realized. Guilty that I hadn’t stopped Rosantine before she’d taken my parents, Lulu’s parents. Guilty at the possibility she’d taken the House because we’d been the ones to go after her. We’d been the ones to chase her.
And I’d been the one to taunt her.
Was this payback for what I’d done?
I moved through the town house like a zombie, but managed the basics. I showered and dressed for a night of work—boots, leggings, fitted long-sleeved top, vest. Then I checked my screen. Micah had sent a message checking in, and assuring me that the fourteen Cadogan vampires who lived in the House, but hadn’t been there when it disappeared, were safe at Washington House. I also found messages from vampire friends in Minnesota offering their condolences and any help they could provide.
I responded to both, then went downstairs, intending to go immediately to the office. But I found bustling in the kitchen.
Connor stood in front of the stove. He wore jeans that traced the lines of his body beautifully and a favorite gray T-shirt.
“What’s this?” I asked, trying and failing to sound even slightly enthusiastic.
He looked back at me from the stove, smiled. “Waffles. Bacon. Eggs. And there’s blood in the fridge. You didn’t eat much yesterday. I thought you might be hungry.”
That he’d taken the time to ensure I ate even as he was grieving warmed me up a little.
“Come here,” he said, and opened his arms. “Just take it one night at a time. One hour at a time. That’s how you’ll figure out how to bring Cadogan back.”
