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"Your guilty secrets are safe with me," he said.
"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"
"Yes. Imagine what would happen if the good women of Landing knew what you wore under your dresses." He grinned and reached for her bodice, but she turned away. "Don't be shy now."
"I can't help it." She secured the last of her buttons. "I'm shocked at what we did."
His smile faded. "I'm glad you said 'we.'"
She raised her chin. "I won't deny I didn't object when you..." Her hand fluttered close to her chest. "But, no one can know."
He drew in a deep breath. "I've always kept your secrets, Megan. You can trust me with these."
The last glow of the passion between them flickered and died. She knew what he was talking about. Their "understanding" seven years ago. He'd never said anything about that. He'd never repeated those horrible things she'd said to him. Even now, she could hear her own words echoing loudly in the silence.
"I'm sorry," she murmured.
"Why? You meant what you said."
Her head jerked as if he'd slapped her. But she couldn't dispute the words. At the time, she would have said anything to convince him she didn't love him anymore.
"Besides, if you get lucky and the town accepts me, you can confess one of your secrets without anyone thinking less of you. With the possible exception of Colleen. I don't think she's ever going to see me other than—"
"Don't say it," Megan demanded, glaring at him. "Stop saying that about yourself. I won't listen to that word again."
Justin looked at her for several seconds, but she couldn't read his expression. She didn't want to know he still thought of himself as a bastard. He was too good for that. He'd always been too good, but seven years ago she'd been too young to see the truth.
"I'd better go," he said, and started down the stairs. "Bonnie should be in bed."
She trailed after him. "Leave her here with me. She's already asleep. I know you think I don't want her here, but I do. I'm sorry I hesitated when you asked me before, but you judged me unfairly. I care about her."
"I believe you." He reached the bottom of the stairs. "But I still have to take her with me. I understand Bonnie and she needs that right now."
Megan was one step above him, so she could stare directly into his eyes. "I understand her, too. I wasn't much older than her when I lost my mother. I know how she feels, lean help."
He shook his head. "It's not about that. You came from a respectable home. Bonnie's mother was a saloon girl. How
are you going to explain it to her when she starts asking questions?"
She had no answer for that. What would she say to the child? Justin was right. Again. Before she walked past him, she reached into her skirt pocket and pulled out the object she'd raced upstairs to get.
"This is yours," she said, handing it to him. "I meant to return it that last night, but I forgot."
He stared at the pocketknife. The light in the hallway reflected off the polished surface, illuminating the initials carved there. She was surprised they could still be seen. How many times had she traced those letters with her fingers, as if rubbing them again and again would bring Justin back to her?
"Why did you keep it?" he asked.
"I don't know," she answered honestly. "I tried to throw it away, but I couldn't. I'll get Bonnie's things."
She placed the girl's new clothes and shoes in a cloth bag, then put Bonnie's precious corn-husk doll on top. Justin picked up the sleeping child and held her against his chest. Megan handed him the bag.
When she opened the front door, he stepped onto the porch. "Good night," she whispered.
He didn't answer for a long time. "Was there anything between you and that farmer?" he asked abruptly.
"Cameron? Of course not," she answered without thinking, then bit back a groan. She should have been coy.
"Good," Justin said. He started across the porch.
Megan watched until he disappeared into the night. Good? He thought it was good that she hadn't been involved with the handsome widower? Why?
She'd already closed the door and was dousing the lights downstairs when she got her answer. Justin had been jealous. There was no need for him to be. There had never been anyone but him. She was starting to wonder if there ever would be again.
