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“Have you ever thought about what our lives would have been like if we were the same size?”
I stopped dead in my tracks, belatedly reaching a hand up so she didn’t pitch forward into a tree.Of all the things I expected her to ask, this was not one of them.
“Sorry, I thought I saw something,” I lied, picking up the pace again.
“You didn’t answer my question,” she reminded me.
“Oh, right. Um, I guess not really,” I lied, again.
“Hey, Edrich?”
“Yeah, Lina?”
“You’re an even worse liar than I am.”
I didn’t answer her, not just because I didn’t want to admit it, but also because my mind was suddenly spinning about three years backward.
“Edrich.” My mother’s tone was soft, but firm. “How will you find a wife if you spend all your time with Lina?”
“I don’t want a wife, Mama,” I insisted. “No one’s ever going to get me like she does, anyway.”
“I see,” she sighed. “And does she feel the same way?”
“I… don’t know,” I admitted.
“Then maybe now would be the time to walk away before it gets even harder.”
“What?” I looked up, surprised. My mother loved Lina, but more than that, she knew why I could never leave her side.
“You’ve been burdened by this oath for too long. We will make sure Lina is safe. You know that I adore her, but I think you need distance to see this situation more clearly.”
“Distance isn’t going to change how I feel.” I shook my head.
She put a hand on my shoulder, and I covered it with my own.
“I hope that isn’t true, because I love you, Edrich, and I love her, and I want what’s best for you both. And a life where you can never have a family, have children, or even the comfort of one another’s arms… that’s not what’s best for either of you.”
“I don’t care about those things.” I was fighting to stay calm, but the truth of her words was hitting like a battering ram.
“Not for yourself, maybe, but what about for Lina? We still don’t know who she is or where she comes from. If someone her size comes along someday, will she really thank you for tying her down to the kind of half-life you’re talking about?”
I sank into one of the wooden kitchen chairs. Was that how Lina would see it? Being tied down by me? If there was even a chance of that, was my mother right? Would it be better to spare us both?
Three days later, Atesh had come—my father had mentioned my skill with animals, and he was in need of a falconer. I had followed my mother’s advice and gone with him, but I had been right, in the end.Time hasn't changed how I feel.
“It means jealousy.” Lina’s slightly too loud voice in my ear startled me out of my thoughts. “Dark green,” she added.
“Why didn’t you want to admit that?”
“Ah ah ah.” She wagged her finger at me. “You don’t get another question when you never really answered mine.”
“I did, too,” I said.
“Lies!” She practically shouted, before melting into a fit of drunken giggles, again.
“Fine! Yes, Lina, I thought about it. We were together all the time. Of course I thought about it. Hell, there was a time that was pretty much all I did.”
Well, that had been more truth than I meant to give her, but it was out there now, in the forest that suddenly felt far too quiet in the wake of Lina’s stunned silence.
