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When minutes had passed and he still didn’t respond, I stood straighter, trying to will a confidence into myself that I didn’t ever feel around him anymore.
“I’m leaving in two days. If you want to come with me, meet me here at dawn,” I said, with a forced, casual smile.
Edrich downed the rest of his ale and stood, the scraping of his chair ringing out louder than any other noise in the bar.
“No,” he repeated, with finality. “Evenifthe fairies still exist, the forest is no place for you. People bigger and stronger than you walk into that forest and don’t come back out.”
My eyes widened, and I stared at him incredulously as he pulled out two copper coins from his pocket and set them down on the bar.
“I know the stories. I know the risk, and that it’s a long shot.” I fought to keep my voice even. “You don’t have to believe in the fairies, Edrich, but is it so much for you to ask to believe in me?”
Piper cleared her throat and motioned for another round, while Neira busied herself to provide it, giving us a moment of privacy.
He didn’t look at me when he responded, his voice tired… and maybe even a little bit sad. “I’m not like you, Lina. I can’t make myself believe in something that isn’t true. So yes, it is a lot to ask that I just set reason aside and believe that you will magically make it through the most dangerous forest in the world unscathed, that you’ll find your way to creatures no one has seen or heard from in a thousand years.”
A bitter huff of air escaped my lips, but I tried one more time. “Can you honestly not understand at all why I need to do this?”
Edrich finally turned back to face me, his eyes meeting mine.
“No, I can’t say that I do understand why you feel the need to risk your life chasing a legend. And mine, apparently.” He ran his hand over his eyes, his features somewhere between exasperation and pleading. “Just… stay here, at the farm, with your animals and your flowers, where it’s peaceful and safe. Whereyou’resafe.”
Leaving no room for further conversation, he grabbed his cloak and left the tavern. The man he’d arrived with, the one who had been pining over Neira, followed after him.
The only sound I heard was the chiming bells ringing out over the door while I stared after his shadow.
I wondered if he heard how condescending that sounded.Stay safe, Lina. You’re too tiny and weak to go off into the forest, Lina.
A heat wave rolled through me, and I was certain that my skin had once again deepened to ruby.
I drank down the rest of the ale quickly, as every look, every word, every sigh raced through my mind. A twitch of pain jolted down my spine, and I tried to breathe through it, counting slowly until it passed.
Maybe that was the worst part. As much as I’d implied that I could do it on my own, I knew full well that I couldn’t. Not really.Not like this.
“You all right, Lina?” Neira eventually asked, bringing me back to the present.
I looked up to see her and Piper silently waiting.
“I’m fine,” I said, pushing my chalice toward Neira and burying my anger. “It’s probably time for me to head home, too.”
“Oh, no. Not yet, you’re not.” Piper added with a shake of her head. “Not until you tell us the full story. Why the sudden urge to run off to find the fairies? And why would you want to take that brooding oaf with you?”
Her question stung for more reasons I cared to admit at that moment.He wasn’t always brooding, I wanted to say. But I was tired of defending him tonight, and tired of thinking about the person he used to be, when he had made it so clear who he was now. Instead, I answered her first question.
“I need to know where I came from. I need to know if I really am the only one of my kind.”
Piper rested her hand next to me, and I leaned into it.
“As much as we can, Lina, we understand,” she said, softly.
“We really do,” added Neira. “But how do you know if you’ll even find them? If they even still exist?”
“I don’t. But I have to try. I need to know if I’m the only one of my kind.”
I need to know if I’ll be alone for the rest of my life.
4
Edrich
