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Chapter 3
Despite Hannah wanting to spend my last single night together, the guys won—only because they decided to include her along with Daniel, Malik, and Travis. We were meeting them in one of the common rooms in the boys’ dorm, but I couldn’t bring myself to enter the building.
“What do I say?” I asked Hannah for the third time. Each answer she gave wasn’t something I could live with.
I couldn’t ask Natasha. I didn’t want her knowing her words affected me. I didn’t want to show her that weakness. Something in my intuition told me not to. I didn’t have a full-blown premonition but enough of a feeling that I trusted.
Outright asking Theo was the most logical, but would be humiliating.
I could ask Sai, but that made it seem like I either didn’t trust Theo to tell me the truth or I was a big ol’ chicken.
Only the latter half was true. I trusted him to tell me. I wasn’t sure I wanted to know. From him. I didn’t want him to see my initial reaction.
“You can text him,” she offered.
That was even more of a chicken move.
We were supposed to be bonded tomorrow. If I couldn’t handle a conversation about his past, how were we going to survive?
It wasn’t even that he had a past. It was just Natasha. The only other girl I knew at this school. We were even heading in the direction of being friends. She didn’t seem to care about me bonding with Theo or the rest of the guys, so I shouldn’t. She was obviously a bigger, more confident person.
“This is something you need to talk to all of them about. It’s not going to change anything. You’re still going through with the bonding, so maybe you can put it off. Wait until things settle.”
I wrapped my arms around myself. “No, I can’t do that. I can’t start something this important with a question this big hanging over us.”
“Then, it’s probably a good idea to discuss what the expectations are as well.”
“With me?”
She nodded. “Technically, this is your marriage, so even if you were waiting for that . . .”
My heart nearly stopped, then raced. That? Like sex?
I’ve just been waiting to meet a guy I was interested enough in. None of the boys at my last school met my minimum requirements, which were comically low. Be nice, smell good, take me on a real date, and don’t be a jerk.
I kissed a few guys, but nothing spectacular or worth remembering.
Going from a few high school kisses to moving in together was enough of a mental hurdle. Adding in a physical relationship with all four of them was mind-blowing. Not in a good way.
“Hey, breathe.” Hannah waved her hands, and I sucked in a breath and held it until she waved them down. “Good. No freaking out. Remember, you’re in control. None of them will force anything before you’re ready.”
“How do you know?”
She cocked her head and gave me a look that told me she was questioning my intelligence. “Okay, I don’t know Kaden, but the other three would never let that happen.”
She was right. I knew they wouldn’t let anyone hurt me, especially one of them.
“Let’s go in there and feel things out.”
She looped her arm around mine. We found the room and slipped off our coats as the guys quieted. Daniel kissed her cheek and pulled her away, leaving me to make the decision of where to go. Unfortunately, my four mates were scattered around the room. I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, so I found a central location next to Malik and Travis.
“Hey, congratulations.” Travis offered me a small smile.
I tried to return the gesture, but it was more of a cringe. “Thanks.”
“Are you ready for this?” Malik asked.
“Not really, but there isn’t time for me to adjust. We need to make this official.”
