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She had to laugh at this. “Are you saying I’m a tiger too?” No. She wasn’t a tiger—not anymore. Maybe before Kyle, but something about being with him and then losing him had tamed whatever tiger had lived within her. Now she wasn’t even sure she could muster the energy to be the deer she’d claimed to be.
His gaze never wavered. “Maybe. Or maybe an owl, not quite a dragon.”
She looked away. This question had been listed under flirty and fun. How the hell had she managed to screw it up?
Seth’s hand snaked across the table and took hold of hers. A spark of recognition raced up her arm.Pleasure. This man’s touch could bring her pleasure.
She snatched her hand away. With pleasure always came pain.
“I’m sorry.” He withdrew his hand, fisting it around his nearly empty glass.
“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” she assured him. Maybe she should just tell him about Kyle and explain that she wasn’t good at talking and certainly not any good at flirting. “Seth, it’s not—”
“Okay ladies, time to move on. Blow your goodbye kisses and slip on over to the next table and the next lucky dater.”
Courtney swallowed down the explanation she’d been about to give. Seth didn’t care about her issues. After she’d run from him that morning and then this disastrous little meeting, he wouldn’t be checking her name on the compatibility sheet anyway. He’d find someone to spend his time with, and she could be left alone with her blessed silence.
“Thank you,” she told him, slipping out of her seat.
Silently he nodded, never taking his eyes from her.
Courtney cast a glance at the next table. The man looked barely out of high school. He’d probably never loved a girl, certainly never buried a spouse. She couldn’t make herself sit at his table. What would even be the point? Dropping her unmarked sheet into the trash, she left the room and headed to the bar.
CHAPTERTHREE
“There you are.”Ashley plopped into the plush seat next to where Courtney sat nursing her second drink. “What happened? I don’t think anyone was expecting you to ditch the speed dating.”
“I told you I didn’t want to do speed dating or any dating. I’m not here to find someone new, Ashley.”
Her friend sighed. “You mean that, don’t you?”
“Have you known me to say many things I don’t mean?” When Ashley didn’t answer, she turned her attention to the other woman. “Well?”
“Five years ago, I would’ve said no.”
“But?”
“But you changed after Kyle.”
Tears stung Courtney’s eyes. “My husband died. How was I supposed to stay—”
“Before that. Before you even married him. You used to be fearless, Corey.” She snickered. “You wouldn’t even let us call you that anymore. Do you remember?”
Blinking back tears, she turned away. How could she forget? Kyle hated the nickname she’d carried her entire life. He said it was a name for a boy not a woman.
“I just want to see some of that old Corey again.” Ashley slipped her hand into Courtney’s and squeezed. “I love you no matter what you are—fearless or cowering. I just can’t believe you enjoy being unhappy.” She paused as if waiting for Courtney to say something, but she had nothing to say. She didn’t enjoy being unhappy, but she didn’t know how to stop.
“I won’t make you go to any more couple things. I promise.” Ashley held up her small, pink tipped pinky. “Just promise me you’ll try to enjoy the cruise itself. Go on excursions, swim in the pool, go to the spa, whatever. You don’t have to have any sex or get with any guys. Just do what makes youhappy. Please.”
The sincerity in her friend’s words brought fresh tears to Courtney’s eyes. She might not agree with Ashley’s sneaky tactics to get her on the ship, but she had to admit her friend had her best interests at heart.
“Okay.” She held up her own pinky with its short, unpolished nail. “I’ll have fun.”
Smiling, Ashley looped their pinkies together. “I noticed you didn’t say anything about not having sex in that promise.”
* * *
Seth watched Courtney and Ashley sitting in the corner as he and Zack waited for their orders at the bar. They were smiling, laughing even. Courtney looked so relaxed sitting with her friend. Of course, the two empty martini glasses in front of her might have something to do with that relaxed look.
