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‘Of course I do,’ she replies.
‘Then stay away from him,’ I insist. ‘I am your sister, I love you, and I only want what’s best for you. Stay away from him.’
‘Okay, okay, I get it. Anyway, you know I’m talking about you, what are you doing in my bed, hmm?’
‘I’m inyourbed because I came home last night to find bloody Declan in mine,’ I say.
‘No!’ she shrieks. ‘Declan? Is he still here?’
‘I’d guess so,’ I reply. ‘He was hammered, naked and covered in a takeaway.’
‘Obviously I’m going to go in there and murder him,’ she says, pulling herself to her feet. I catch her hand and pull her back down.
‘That was my first thought too,’ I reply. ‘But I think I need to tread lightly.’
‘No, you need to tread heavily, ideally on his balls,’ she corrects me. ‘Why would you need to tread lightly?’
‘Because he was banging on about how this is his house too,’ I explain. ‘And it technically is. If he wanted to, he could force me to buy him out, which I can’t afford to do – he didn’t even put any money in, never mind hard work, and I really, really don’t want to sell the place, I’ve just got it perfect.’
‘So, it’s not his house at all then, is it?’
‘Not… I don’t know… morally, I guess?’ I reply. ‘But legally speaking, we bought this house in joint names. It doesn’t matter who puts what in. We own this house equally.’
‘And you won’t let me circle back to killing him becaaause…’
‘I just need to think carefully about what the right thing to do is,’ I reply with a heavy sigh. ‘That’s all. Anyway, I think I’ll get up, I need coffee. Want one?’
‘No thanks, I need sleep,’ she replies. ‘I haven’t had much sleep.’
Grim.
Downstairs, I find my parents where they so often seem to be, together at the kitchen island, my mum preparing food and my dad, in the role of her biggest fan, gleefully eating it all. Their chatter seems to calm down as I join them, which seems a little sus.
‘Why is the window open?’ I ask. ‘It’s freezing in here.’
‘Oh, because your dad still can’t flip a pancake,’ Mum says with a laugh. ‘There’s a burnt one in the bin.’
‘I don’t know how you do it, Katie,’ he gushes. ‘You’ll make someone a fantastic wife one of these days.’
Oh, my God, what sort of joke is that? I look over at Mum, who gives him a smile, and a look I can’t quite figure out – it’s like they’re communicating right in front of my face, with a secret code I can’t decipher, and it’s gross.
And speaking of gross, as I close the window, I notice something yucky, and it isn’t the discarded pancake in the bin, it’s Kenny heading to his car.
I grab a coat as I hurry outside in my slippers. I quickly do up my buttons, to hide my pyjamas, even if they are only plain light grey ones.
‘Oi,’ I call out, stopping Kenny in his tracks, before he can get into his black BMW.
He’s dressed smart, in a suit and tie, with a long black heavy coat over the top. He must be headed to work because he has one of those laptop cases in his hands.
‘Good morning,’ he says brightly. ‘Sleep well? I can’t say I got much.’
‘I’ll sleep much better if you leave my sister alone,’ I say sternly, cutting to the chase.
‘What?’ Kenny replies through a chuckle.
‘I’m serious, Kenny, stay hell away from Jess,’ I warn him. ‘I will ruin your life.’
I’m not exactly sure how I would do that but hopefully it sounds good.
