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‘Obviously I wouldn’t keep it,’ I eventually say. ‘I would hand it in to the police.’
‘That’s what I though you would say,’ Jess confirms. ‘And that’s what I would do too.’
Mum laughs.
‘This game wasn’t so plain sailing when we used to play it with our friends,’ she says through a chuckle.
‘You’ve got that right,’ Dad replies, widening his eyes for effect.
‘Mum, you’re up, read a card for Dad,’ I prompt her.
I feel a lump in my throat as I swallow hard. This is the one. The question that’s going to solve everything. The game over that we need.
‘Okay, here we go,’ she starts. ‘So… would you remain friends with someone who swapped their partner of many years for someone younger, because they no longer found their partner attractive?’
I don’t know why, when we were planning this, having Mum read that question didn’t feel as harsh as it does, hearing her read it out loud. Was this a mistake?
She raises her eyebrows at Dad.
‘Go on, then, write something down,’ she instructs him. She takes her pencil and begins writing straight away, clearly knowing exactly what she’s going to say from the get-go. Jess and I exchange a look, while we wait for them to finish.
‘Okay,’ Jess says. ‘Dad?’
‘Well, I suppose I would,’ Dad says sheepishly. ‘Because I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t, seeing as I left your mum for someone else.’
My breath catches in my throat. That might be the first time I’ve heard him say it out loud. I wasn’t expecting that at all, neither was Jess.
‘And that’s what I wrote,’ Mum says simply. Then she turns back to Dad. ‘And how did that work out for you?’
Right, this is it, it’s going to kick off. I brace myself because, even though this is what we wanted to happen, it’s still not going to be pleasant to witness.
‘It was definitely a mistake,’ Dad says seriously, but then his face moves into more of a smile. ‘And ironically, somehow, now, you look even younger than you did back then. You look phenomenal, Katie. The last laugh is definitely yours.’
‘I think you’ll find that’s karma,’ Mum says through a smile. ‘But I’ll take “phenomenal” – thank you. You actually don’t look so bad either.’
‘Give over,’ Dad says, blushing slightly.
And just like that, the tension is not only dispelled but Mum and Dad seem to be low-key flirting again. No! That is not what is supposed to happen.
‘Your turn,’ Dad tells us through a smile as he tops up his wine. ‘Wow, this is fun.’
I glance over at Jess. She’s cringing. This is not how this was supposed to go.
Unsure what else to do, I pick up a card and read a question to her.
‘Would you sleep with someone who your friend or relative warned you against?’
Oh, wow, that’s topical.
‘Well…’ Jess says, holding onto the word, grimacing awkwardly. ‘I am sort of dating your neighbour, the one that you hate.’
‘Oh, Kenny seems lovely, though,’ Mum says, so I take it she already knew about the two of them. ‘Do you really hate him, Billie?’
‘I do, but wait, you’re not actually seeing him again, are you?’ I say. ‘You said you wouldn’t – I warned you off him.’
‘Jess, your sister must have good reason,’ Dad chimes in. ‘You should listen to her, if she knows the bloke is no good.’
‘Oh, God, don’t you start,’ Jess warns him, before turning back to me. ‘Obviously I only said that to shut you up. Sorry, sis, but I do really like him.’
