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“Oh my gosh!” Molly gasps.
“No, not like that. He was building the crib for the baby.”
“That’s so sweet,” she gushes. “Tell me again why you’re not hitting that?”
“Because he’s the father of my child and I’m sure he’s hitting it with someone else,” I say, biting my cheek. I still hate thinking about it but it has to be true. Sure, last night we sort of had a moment but that was just it, a moment. It passed and since he didn’t bring it up, neither would I. There is no point, especially when it is obvious we shouldn’t be starting anything so close to becoming parents.
“I highly doubt that. And you may be pregnant but you’re still beautiful.” She smiles softly.
“Thank you.” I don’t agree but I take the compliment.
I go home earlier than usual, hoping to catch Cody before he leaves but he’s still at work when I get there. Following the sounds of a hammer and banging, I find him in the nursery. Instead of the mess it was this morning, the nursery is basically complete. The crib is put together against the wall, the rocking chair is in the corner, and he’s putting together the dresser.
“You did all this?” I ask, surprised.
“Shit, I was trying to have it done before you got home.” He looks at his watch.
“I’m home early,” I explain.
“I can move the stuff if it’s not in the right places, but I thought it would be good to get everything together.” He stands.
“I think it’s perfect.” I smile.
“Great, I moved all the presents from the shower into the closet but wanted to have all the big pieces done. I hope that’s okay.”
“It’s really helpful, thank you.” I hadn’t been sure how I’d get everything together with my belly but I also wasn’t going to ask for any help. He must’ve known that.
“Also, let me know if there’s anything you’re missing. I can grab it for you before she’s here.”
“You don’t--”
“Please let me?”
“Okay.” I nod. I am no used to someone wanting to take care of me like this. It is an unfamiliar and scary feeling.
Cody flips the dresser up against the wall, and that’s when I notice that he put up the wall art I got as well. It is quotes from stories I had loved growing up. Not princess ones about falling in love but one from Winnie the Pooh; ‘You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.’. In cursive writing it looks beautiful above the mirror Cody had also put up. I should’ve known how much effort he’d put into making her room feel like a home. I can’t help the tears from falling as I stand in the doorway.
Cody rushes to my side. “Are you okay?” He looks around for a tissue and grabs me one. “Luna, you’re scaring me. Can you please say something?”
“She’s just so lucky to have such an incredible father, even before she’s here.” I sob.
“Hey, it’s okay.” He pulls me in his arms and I fall into him. His familiar scent, his warmth, his everything. Just like the past few months never happened, my emotions come flooding to the surface. I don’t think before I reach for him, leaning in for a kiss and giving in to my desires. Our lips meet, and it’s as if no time has passed. They lock together and for a brief moment, nothing else matters. Only to be slapped with reality.
“We can’t,” Cody says quietly against my lips. His eyes are pained as he looks at me, like this is hurting him as much to say it as it’s hurting me to hear it.
“I’m sorry.” I let go and run to my room feeling like an idiot. Him and I had been doing so well. We had agreed to be co-parents, he was building the nursery, and I had to go and let my hormones run the show.What the hell is wrong with me?
I lay in my bed, sobbing into my pillow, hoping to quiet the sound. I can hear that he’s still here but he doesn’t come after me or say anything more. What else can he possibly say? He had been clear enough. He isn’t into me like that anymore and I read the entire situation wrong.
“Luna?” He knocks on my door. “I’m going to take off.”
“Okay!” I yell through the door.
“Can you come talk to me first?” I don’t answer. “Please?”
I claw myself out of bed and open the door, refusing to look at him. I know my eyes must look crazy from crying.
“I’m sorry,” he says.
