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He called Isaac boy. He calls me girl. Does he think of me as someone that young? I mean, I am that young in age, but really, I’ve always felt much older in spirit than my friends. Or in comparison to Isaac, for that matter. Age-wise, I am closer to Isaac, but on a soul level, I might as well be in an older age bracket. But JJ can’t see that. All he notices is me in the role of Isaac's girlfriend. I’ll never be more than that to him. So why am I still thinking of him?
I walk over to the nearest shelf and run my fingers across the spines of the books.Moby Dick, Don Quixote, Crime and Punishmentby Dostoevsky—to be expected. Also, Dickens, Tolkien, Aldous Huxley, Leo Tolstoy, Harper Lee, Jules Verne, Bram Stoker—which I didn’t expect. And volumes of Shakespeare. He did quote the Bard earlier, but I didn’t think he’d have studied his works in such detail. I pause. A space has been cleared in the shelf below it. Maybe he’s looking to buy more books?
“That space is for you.”
I glance over my shoulder to find JJ’s gaze on me.
“Excuse me?” I mutter.
“Your books—” He tilts his chin in my direction. “You like reading books, don’t you?”
“Given the choice, she’d prefer to curl up with a book than talk to people,” Isaac interjects.
“Nothing wrong with that.” JJ’s lips curve slightly. “Books are far more trustworthy. Also, they don’t talk back to you.”
I snort. “Leave it to you to take the pleasure of reading and turn it into something misanthropic. Also, thanks, but no thanks. I prefer to have my books close where I can see them and touch them many times a day.”
His nostrils flare and his gaze narrows. I know I’ve pissed him off by turning him down. Also, that came out more suggestive than I’d intended. Or maybe I had wanted him to feel how frustrated I am? Damn, why am I acting in such a contradictory fashion? He’s my boyfriend’s father. So he’s attractive, but he’s also an asshole. Someone I need to keep at arm's length. But it’s so much fun getting a rise out of him, too.
I walk over to Isaac and touch his shoulder. "Hey, babe, where’ve you been all this time?"
"Hey." Isaac's lips twitch. He pulls me into his lap.
The hair on the back of my neck prickles. I can feel JJ’s eyes bore through me. I ignore him and focus my attention on my boyfriend. "Didn’t realize there was a party happening here. Why didn’t you invite me?"
I pluck the cigar from Isaac’s lips and plop it between mine. I puff on the cigar then blow out a cloud of smoke straight in JJ’s face.
His gaze narrows.
I allow my lips to curve, and tip my chin up toward Isaac. "I woke up and missed you. Why don’t you come on up to bed?"
20
Isaac
I squeeze my girlfriend closer. Goddamn, but I’ve missed her. There was a time when we were so close to each other—both of us away from our families. Along with Ben. The three of us were inseparable. We shared a flat and went to university together. Ben was studying to be a doctor, I was pursuing a degree in fine arts, and Lena was focused on getting her MBA. The three of us were so different, and yet we fit somehow. There was never a dull moment when we were together. We didn’t have much money, but we made up for it by having parties at our tiny apartment. It was pretty much an open house most days. Or at least, as much as Ben could push us to open it up to the other students. I didn’t mind. I was happy to go along with his plans. Left to myself, I’d have spent most of my time painting or taking photographs for inspiration, instead of hanging out with people. With the exception of Ben and Lena, that is. Lena had been different in those days. Much more sociable. Oh, she was as focused on starting a career and talked about the security it would give her, even then. But she took time out to enjoy life. Thanks to Ben’s influence. I weave my fingers through hers. "Missed you, Dinky."
She frowns. "I never should have introduced you to my family."
"You’ve met her family?" my father growls from across the table.
What’s crawled up his ass now? For a few seconds there, I thought we were getting along. Almost. I should have known it was too good to be true. I never should have allowed him to lure me into playing chess with him. But, it’s one of the few happy memories I have from my childhood—playing chess with my father. It was the one time he seemed to forget about his job and his company, when he focused his entire attention on the chessboard. The one time he was completely present… while playing chess with me.
It’s why I agreed to the game. Why I agreed to smoke a cigar with him. Not that it was a hardship, of course. The bastard has good taste when it comes to his whiskey... and cigars... and clothes... and choice of home, I suppose. I fucking loved this house. He may have been gone a lot, but he made sure my sister Tally and I lacked for nothing. Sure, we could have done with his being around more often, but we had enough friends at school and could invite them around any time.
Our mother wasn’t very present in our lives, either. She might have been physically in the house but she was too busy with her social life, not to mention her discreet affairs on the side. The only time she brought home a lover, Tally walked in on them. She told our father about it, and JJ was enraged. He told our mother in no uncertain terms that if she brought another one of her boy-toys around, he’d ensure she lost her monthly allowance. That shut things down pretty quickly, I can tell you. Our mom knew exactly how to play the game.
The deal, as we found out later—Mother made sure she told us before she departed—was that she stay home and keep up the pretense of marriage with JJ until we came of legal age, at which time, she could leave with a massive fortune. If she left before that, she forfeited all the money. So she stayed, and she wasn’t a bad mother—when she remembered to be one, that is. Part of the deal was that she not flaunt her lovers in our face. Just like he kept his private life discreet. Sometimes I wonder what brought the two of them together. I assume they were in love once. Whatever it was seemed to have faded away very quickly, though, for I have almost no memories of the two of them being together.
After watching the two of them, I swore that when I did marry, it would be to someone I loved more than anything else in life. Someone I couldn’t live a minute without. Someone I wanted as much as I needed to breathe air.
While our parents weren’t always around, my sister and I always backed each other up. We were each other’s best friends, until she finally went off to university. I missed her a lot, and to some extent, the friendship I had with Ben and Lena helped bridge that gap. Those university years were probably the happiest of my life. Maybe that’s why I was clinging onto those memories and didn’t want to let go.
Maybe that’s why I feel this need to be with Lena. Maybe that’s why I’m going to try to be a better boyfriend. I weave my fingers through her slimmer ones.
"Yes, I’ve met her family." I bring her fingertips up to my mouth and kiss them. "Do you know they call her Dinky because she used to be tiny?”
“I grew up.” She scowls
