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A pounding on the door rips us out of the moment. “In one minute, I’m coming in, and you better not still be having sex. And at least cover yourselves with a blanket, so I can pretend Rae isn’t naked in there!” Joel yells through the door.
Okay, maybe there are some downsides to this college thing. Like sharing a room when you’re an only child. Especially when the person you’re sharing it with is practically your girlfriend’s brother.
Rae buries her head in my neck and laughs. I pull the sheet over both of us, so only our heads are showing. “You can come in now,” I yell.
Joel walks in with his hand over his eyes and immediately runs into the corner of the desk, letting out a string of curse words as he does.
“Joel, calm down. You can’t see my tits!” Rae yells, laughing hysterically.
Joel pulls his hand off his eyes and relaxes slightly. “There’s a learning curve to this room-sharing thing, apparently.”
“Sorry, I thought you’d be gone most of the afternoon.”
Joel freezes and turns to look at me. “I, uh, needed to get some work out clothes. I’m working out with the team. It’s once a week right now, but—”
“You don’t have to explain,” I say, my voice growing tight.
“Do you, uh, wanna come?”
“Why? It’s not like I’m on the team.”
Rae slides under the sheet, not wanting to be in the midst of this fight. She runs her hand over my chest in a soothing way, but it’s not enough to keep me from being annoyed at Joel. It’s hard enough not being involved. His pity invites only make it worse.
“Coach M told you he’d still love to have you involved. If you talk to him, maybe he could give you a PT recommendation and then—”
“Then what? Everything will magically be better and I won’t have lost a year of conditioning and I’ll be pitching screwballs like I used to? Therapy wasn’t working. My hand is what it is. Let it go.”It only makes it worse for me when he keeps dangling something in front of me that I can’t have.Rae has tensed up at the sharpness of our words. I gently run my hand over her shoulder. This isn’t about her. It’s not her fault. Honestly, I wish she wasn’t here while we’re doing this. But then she wraps her arms around me and kisses my chest, and maybe it’s good that she’s here.
“Look, Joel, I—”
He grabs his workout clothes and stands at the foot of my bed, staring me down. “I’m not trying to be an ass. I’m trying to get you to keep fighting instead of rolling over and giving up.”
I gape at him and am about to respond when Rae throws the sheet off her head and stares daggers at Joel.
“Don’t be an asshole, Joel.”
They stare at each other for a long moment, then Joel’s shoulders slump in defeat. He shakes his head in disappointment, which makes every muscle in my body tighten in anger.
“Whatever,” he grumbles, before walking out the door.
I know Rae can feel the swirling emotions coming off me. She slowly turns back to me and lays against me.
“You okay?” she asks, running her finger in soft circles on my chest.
I gently glide my hand over her hair. “It still sucks some days, but I’ll be fine.” I know I don’t sound convincing. Mostly because it doesn’t feel like it’s going to be fine, but I have to learn to live with it.
“Aaron…” she says softly.
But I shake my head. There are too many good things for me to be wallowing in the bad ones. I run my hand down her back. “I’m naked in bed with you. How could I be anything but good?”
Disappointment flashes across her face for a fraction of a second, then she smiles and kisses my chest. “We should probably put that to good use, then.” She slides back under the sheet again, this time moving farther down, kissing down my chest and stomach until she reaches my—
Oh fuck.
Forget everything else.
I love college.
My fingers tangle in her hair as every part of my body fires up.
