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Another memory whispers by. The hallway at my parents’ house as a child. Frozen in place on the way to the bathroom. I’d heard a ghost. It sounded horrible to be a ghost. Like it hurt.
“There’s no way she fixed that.” Eva’s only a little bit older than Leo, and definitely not a doctor. “You had to go somewhere.”
“I didn’t. We used rubbing alcohol.”
Agony. It had to be agony. “And that was enough?”
“No. It got infected afterward. She had to drive me to the hospital while everyone else was out of the house.”
“Oh my god. Was that—” Eva sitting next to me on the couch in one of the sitting rooms with her arm around me.It’s just a trip for school, she said.He’ll be back soon. “That was the trip for school.”
Leo’s mouth hints at a smile. “I’m surprised you remember that.”
I’ll never forget the trip for school.
I don’t want to tell him why.
“I remember more than you think.”
His expression sobers. “I’m sure you do.”
“You should have told me.” My tears feel like plain salt now, burning into my skin. “You should have let me choose.”
My brother reaches for my hand and holds it. “There wasn’t a lot of choice to go around.”
“You should have let all of us choose.” Because. “You fought with Dad. You got hurt. And now I find out—now I find out it’s on top of this.”
“That was the deal,” Leo says. “The more he came after me, the less he came after you.”
“You could have said—”
He very nearly laughs. “Could have said what?By the way, Daphne, Caroline Constantine attacked me. Could Dad beat the shit out of you this time?” Leo shakes his head. “No.”
“Leo.”
“I was trying to give you a chance.”
“To do what?”
“To be anybody in the world. Anyone you wanted to be.” His voice thins out. “I didn’t want you to have to be me. Angry all the time. Hurt all the time. It’s exhausting.” He squeezes my hand, and it’s like watching a house of cards tumble to the ground. I’ve always seen Leo as invincible. Practically all-powerful. I didn’t think about the cost. And this—this is costing him. There’s a tension around his eyes that I assumed was irritation, but it’s not. I know now. It’s pain. “I can’t let it happen, Daphne. I can’t let this collector take anything from you against your will.”
I stand up, and so does he, and this time when I hug him, I hesitate. He’s always moving my arms at the last second. Always with his guard up. I thought it was because he was ticklish, or something like that, but it’s the scars. My heart breaks all over again.
“I wish you would have told me. It hurts that you didn’t say anything.”
“I know.”
“I’m still kind of mad.”
“I know that, too.”
I’m not going to fight him on this anymore. I’ll stay. Guilt coats the insides of my lungs. It’s hard to breathe like this. It was probably harder for Leo, all these years. It’s the smaller moments that make me want to sob right now. I can picture Eva’s face when he stepped into the foyer. The moment the rubbing alcohol touched his skin. Blood on the hem of a shirt. I imagine the ocean washing these thoughts away so I can sleep tonight. How has he lived like this? How?
“Are you pissed at me?”
Leo huffs a laugh, but it sounds sad. “No, sister mine. I’m not.”
Chapter Fifteen
