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“That was about—” I drop my head into my hands. It’s fucking infuriating, how a space can shift like this. It’s too small now. A light flicks on behind a closed door. The glowing outline hangs in the dark. My heart rate goes up, so I uncover my eyes. No peace, anywhere. That night in the frame was about putting distance between me and her. So that I could be a neutral observer to her pleasure, the way a collector should admire art. Instead she drew me in deeper. So deep I drowned in her waves. “You’re late for your meeting.”
Will adjusts the cuffs of his sleeves, posture settling in.
Bastard.
I’ve done this to myself. I invited my brothers over. I let them in. And now I’m fucked, because I don’t have the time to spend on dragging this out. I don’t have the energy to refuse the conversation.
“I was too soft with her. That’s what I thought. I let her call her brother, and I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea.”
“So you called your brothers.”
“So I decided to play a game with her. To remind her what kind of person I am.”
My brother raises his eyebrows. “The kind of person who’s obsessed with her.”
“An asshole, Will. That I’m an asshole. Worse than Dad.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“That’s how it started. It was a game, and it was more. By the end, it was more.”
“A test,” he says flatly. “To see if you could trust us.”
“To see if I could let someone admire her.” Can’t keep the words in. Not another moment. “I already trusted you. Otherwise I wouldn’t have invited you over. I wouldn’t have let you touch her if she wasn’t enjoying herself. No, I did it to prove to myself that she meant nothing more than art.” I get up from the chair and move away from the window.
“Did it work?”
A hollow laugh. “Not exactly.”
“She’s the most valuable piece you own.”
“There’s nothing more valuable.” Please, let this end soon. “But sometimes caring for a piece means letting it go. That’s what she needs. That’s what she wants, even if she doesn’t see it now. Her family means everything to her.”
Will scoffs. “She wanted you the whole time. You were the only one who mattered. I can’t tell you how, but I know.”
I can tell him. It’s because Daphne’s balance shifts to follow me. All the time. Whenever we’re in the same room. “I wanted you to see her. To…pleasure her. You’re the only people on this earth I would have trusted enough to do that for me.”
“You’re nothing like Dad. You know that? He never cared what a woman wanted. Not ever. All you care about is what she wants. Which is why…”
“Why what?”
“Which is why I can’t believe you left her. She loves you.”
To hear another person say it so matter-of-factly does something wrenching to my heart.
“She wanted me to go. Demanded it.”
He arches an eyebrow. “Isn’t that only because her brother was about to murder you?”
“It doesn’t matter why. It’s better if I stay away forever. Let her have a life. I’ll be fine without her, like you said.” Rising panic laps at my chest. “Go to your fucking meeting. There’s nothing for you to do here.”
“I could make soup.”
“I don’t want soup.” I don’t want anything, except for Daphne. I haven’t been hungry since I got here. “I’ll be fine.”
He glances at his watch, then the door. Will wants to meet this person. A woman, I think. Someone he likes to spend time with. And he should. His life doesn’t have to grind to a halt because his fugitive brother is losing his mind. This is part of the reason I kept them at a distance for years. I don’t want them to know how often this has happened lately.
“Will you text me if you feel worse?” Will asks.
