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Not anymore. Diego is gone, and I am no longer that frightened little girl.
Despite Pedro’s warnings and any hope of saving Franco this way, my response to Jaguar is instinctual and driven by rage. “I’m going to find someone man enough to do the job.”
With his beautiful gowns and nip slips, Pedro is a more promising option than a psychopathic narco, anyway. If I beg hard enough, he might be able to pull some strings despite his prior insistence. It’s my only option.
“Wait. I said wait—stop, Lupe.”
With each terse word, my entire body resonates with the authority laced within that lethal tone. I do stop. When I look back, Jaguar hasn’t budged from his position, but his entire stance has changed, transforming him from a playful bachelor into a formidable opponent. Only a woman with a death wish would deny someone so powerful.
“You think you can dictate to me?” he asks, his head cocked, face in shadow.
I should be afraid, but it’s somehow easier than ever to ignore my trembling limbs and nod. “I would never insult you,” I counter. “But if you would rather test me, I don’t have the time. I told you what I offer. Take it or leave it.”
His men erupt in taunting laughter that dies when their leader doesn’t join in.
“A woman who wants tohonorme would do whatever the hell I say,” Jaguar says, parroting my voice with a guttural note. “You’d sleep with one man or a thousand, merely to please me.”
Damn it. He’s a narcissist too, it seems—a potential snag Pedro had warned me about.Some men are fucking psychos, Pita. If he doesn’t take no for an answer, you run like hell.
“I wouldn’t want to deny you what you deserve,” I tell him, surprised by how strongly my voice resonates. “What I can offer, is for you alone and no one else. Yours. Compelling me to perform in a charade would sully that. Ruin it. You would never know how good it would be to have me all to yourself.”
More laughter echoes throughout the room. Can I even blame them? I don’t recognize the words coming out of my mouth. Tiena, at her most desperate, would never make such a boast. She fucked Braulio within minutes of meeting him and did so in full view of his boys merely to impress him. I know because she told me, her eyes wide with excitement as if that was something to be proud of.I proved my loyalty to him, Pita…
When Jaguar says nothing, I’m sure I have my answer. Loyalty with him is transactional as well. Heavy with defeat, I head for the hall, already switching gears toward a last-ditch effort. Pedro. His cartel contacts. If they won’t help, I’ll somehow find a way to hijack a private airplane if I have to.
In a daze, I head for that spiral staircase, and I’m caught off guard by the grip that comes from nowhere to cinch my wrist. A brutal motion wrenches me backward, and I spin around to find Jaguar leading me down the hall toward that billiard room.
“D-Don’t…”
Memories descend, sending a wave of bile up my throat. Pain. Agony, followed by a numb, weightless need to lie still and ignore the abuse happening to my body.
A rush of adrenaline counters the fear before it can consume me.No!Never will I endure that trauma again.
“Let go of me!” I lash out, nails drawn. Belatedly, I realize we’ve passed the billiard room, and I hold back, inches from gouging at his skin.
I blame my love for Franco solely for the restraint I find next. Bit by bit, I manage to reassemble my armor seconds before I’m pulled into another room. This one, is blissfully empty, decorated in shades of black and steel gray. It looks like an office, with a view of a darkened courtyard instead of the populated pool below.
“You want me? Then here you go, Lupe,” Jaguar growls, releasing my arm. Even though he’s seemingly capitulated to my request, a new fear takes root. Sex with several men is a chilling prospect, but intimacy withoneman who doesn’t care if he inflicts pain is a phobia I’ve yet to overcome.
Can I do so now on such short notice? My palms are sweating, my chest tight—but there is no choice. When Pedro’s script becomes harder to grasp, I devise my own performance on the fly.
Eyeing Julian Domingas, I picture the one thing in the world I want most. Freedom. An escape from constant fear and anxiety and pain. In him, I pretend to see a future of sunshine and roses, and I let my hesitation fade away.
When he reaches for me, I relax into his grip, leaning against the nearest wall for stability. I make my expression playful and arch my back—but my facade cracks when his hands roughly grope my breasts. Gone is the pretty fantasy. I see a monster who takes what he wants.
In him, I see Diego Mendez.
“You’re a convincing liar, Lupe,” Jaguar murmurs against my neck when I stiffen. “But up close, I can sense your little act for what it is. Bullshit. You’re shaking at my touch, beautiful. You don’t seem very eager for me after all.”
Inhaling deeply, I attempt to meet his gaze. “You’re wrong,” I lie. “It’s anticipation. Not fear.”
“Oh? You talk as though you have a magic pussy,” he says, his breath hot on my throat. “Let’s see if you can back it up.”
Cutting to the chase, he plunges a hand beneath my skirt.
And I panic.God no.As his fingers brush my inner thigh, I feel a frantic sensation like pins and needles. This was a bad idea. Foolish.
But, he isn’t Diego. I tell myself that over and over as he nudges the gusset of my panties with what feels like a thumb. With Julian Domingas, there is no expectation of forever. No complicated emotions. No heartrending betrayal.
