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“Sounds like Rafe.”
“He was disgraced. This is his way of redeeming himself, of proving to Sir Malcolm that he’s worthy to be reinstated as an agent.”
She stared harder, wishing she could disappear into the nothingness inside the glass, a swirl of Mina swallowed away. It was too much risk to take to confess her role in all of this. But now that she’d started, she couldn’t stop. She must tell him everything and let him make his own choices.
“I proposed marriage to Lord Rafe because I viewed him as my path to freedom. I was going to offer him my intimate knowledge of my uncle’s affairs in exchange for an espionage partnership like the one my parents had. They were both spies.”
Now he would silence her. Send her away. Tell her that she was mixed up in something far too dangerous for a young lady.
“You want to form a spy partnership with my brother?” he asked.
She dared a quick glance at his face. Was that hurt in his eyes? “It was to be a marriage of convenience. Not unlike the one you are seeking.”
“Except that you would be spies.”
“Yes.” She couldn’t read his expression. He could be laughing at her, or he could be furious. He was so good at hiding his emotions, maddeningly so.
He poured both of them more brandy. “That’s why you know about secret rooms behind bookshelves and coded diaries. That’s why you carry a flintlock pistol in your purse.”
She nodded. “I found my mother’s hidden diary and I read all about her adventures. I begged Uncle Malcolm to allow me to become a spy but he refused to allow me even a small role in his secret world. He thought he was protecting me but it was a prison.”
“Your mother died young.”
“She died in service to the Crown. By the hand of Le Triton.” Her fingers tightened around the brandy glass. “When I see him I’m going to make him pay for what he did.”
“You’re speaking of... bloodshed?”
“You don’t know what he’s done—the blood on his hands. So much blood. If I have the chance... ifwehave the chance to bring him to justice and avenge my parents’ deaths, then yes.”
“No.” He shook his head back and forth. “No, Mina.” He set his glass down and leaned toward her, resting his elbows on his knees. “I won’t believe that of you. You have your whole life ahead of you. Bloodshed, darkness, evil... none of it has any place in your future.”
This was when he would tell her it was too dangerous. Send her away. “I know it’s difficult for you to understand, but I don’t make this choice lightly. I’ve thought it through carefully.”
“It’s not difficult—it’s impossible. Mina, you’re too alive, you’re too filled with light. You were meant to bring sunshine to this world, not darkness. The life of a spy is filled with danger and uncertainty.”
“Oh, and you’ve never done anything reckless or dangerous in your life?”
“Many, many times. Too many to count. When I was a rake, I tried to use pleasure to blot out the pain. I drank myself into stupors, woke up not knowing what had happened the night before. I entered illegal boxing matches. Welcomed being thrashed nearly to death. Danger is a powerful addiction. I can’t imagine you harming yourself in the same ways. When I look at you all I see is unadulterated goodness and light.”
“Good and pure and helpless. Made to be protected and sheltered. You’ve fashioned me into some kind of conventional paragon of womanhood in your mind.”
“You’re mishearing me. I’m not idealizing you, I’m simply stating what I see. Why risk your life?”
“Men risk their lives all of the time during war. This is no different. I was born into a family of spies. I’m meant to fulfill my destiny.”
“You were meant for a long and happy life. I thought you wanted to have adventures, to travel and meet poets and debate with radical thinkers?”
“I do. I want to make my mark on the world.”
“The world I’ve retreated from.”
“I believe our paths crossed for a reason. You’re part of my adventure. I believe that together we can defeat Le Triton. I want revenge and I want adventure and I want...” Could she confess the last of it? “I want you.”
His eyes the color of firelight, one hand resting on his thigh, palm upward, inviting her touch.
“I want you, too,” he said.
“I can’t sleep because I’m thinking about you, Drew.”
