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“Well . . . yes.”
“Ireland is not the back of beyond, sweetheart.”
“True, but it’s not Glasgow. I’m not fond of living in the city. And Glasgow is where you need to be. I don’t see how we can get around that.”
“Kathleen, you stood on your head trying to avoid leaving Glasgow for Lochnagar. And Lochnagar, I might point out, is both the countryandan actual back of beyond.”
She sighed. “I know. I’m terribly inconsistent. It’s just that my brain is in such a muddle these days with Jeannie and everything else.”
“Everything else including our interlude yesterday?”
When she gave him a sheepish smile by way of reply, Grant chuckled, not looking the least bit put out. The man had the patience of a saint, in addition to all his other fine qualities. Any woman in her right mind would crawl over hot coals to marry him.
And shedidwant to marry him. It was just that—
“Please tell me what else is bothering you,” he quietly asked.
Apparently, he could read minds, too.
“I can’t tell what you’re thinking most of the time,” she said. “You’re very reserved, while I’m the opposite. I feel like we’re not on equal footing.”
He pondered that for several seconds before responding. “Would it surprise you to know there are many times when I cannot tell what you’re thinking?”
“This conversation would suggest otherwise,” she ruefully replied. “I know it’s a dreadful cliché, but I’m an open book compared to you.”
“To expand on that cliché, you only let people read what you want them to read. In fact, I’d say you’re as reserved as I am, only in a different way.”
She frowned. “I don’t think that can be true.”
“AndIthink it’s a way of protecting yourself. You keep others from getting too close, or from talking about the painful events of the past. It’s a form of armor.” He grimaced. “Believe me, I understand.”
Expressed like that, his observation made sense. She did go out of her way to avoid speaking or even thinking of painful things. It was one of the reasons she liked to keep busy, she supposed. Better to be busy than sad.
“You understand, because you needed to protect yourself, too,” she softly replied.
After they sat in silence for a bit, she nudged him. “So, where does that leave us?”
Grant gathered up her hands again and held them to his chest.
“Right where we need to be, I hope. My darling, behind this boring exterior is a man who loves you very much. And he would be very happy if you could manage to love him in return.”
The emotion in the forest-green depths of his gaze perfectly matched his words. Kathleen had no doubt that he loved her with all his heart.
She couldn’t hold back a few sniffles. “Blast. I told myself I wouldn’t cry.”
“Is that a yes?”
“Very likely. But would you mind if I thought about it a bit more? It’s my first proposal. A lady is required to quibble and prevaricate, is she not?”
That was nonsense, of course. But she wished to recover her equilibrium and not burst into emotional and messy tears in front of him.
“Daft girl.” Then he turned serious. “I know this isn’t the life you envisioned, Kathleen. Or what you necessarily wanted. But please also know that I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you happy. Makeushappy.”
She smiled mistily at him. “You are the nicest man I’ve ever met.”
“Thank you,” he wryly replied.
And because he was so nice, a horrible thought darted into her brain. It had been there earlier but had slipped away in the mental commotion of their discussion. “And you’re sure you’re not simply proposing to me because of yesterday? Because there would be gossip about us?”
