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Sabrina gently poked her on the chest. “What’s important is howyouthink of yourself. Everything else flows from that. So, tell me what’s truly bothering you?”
Kathleen grimaced. “I’m in a muddle.”
“And that’s why you’re here. The horses have always calmed you down.”
“True enough.”
The scents and sounds of a stable, the beauty of the horses, and even the gruff comments of grooms hard at work had always been a comfort to her. Life was so much simpler with horses. It was the same with gardening. In a garden or a stable, she could be as solitary and eccentric as she wished, and no one seemed to mind.
They were also the only places where she felt in control of her life.
She glanced at Sabrina, the picture of domestic elegance in a blue kerseymere dress and matching plaid shawl, with not a hair out of place. Her cousin was a woman in control of her life—a miracle, that, considering the complications of running a large estate and a distillery.
“How do you do it?” Kathleen exclaimed. “How do you manage it all without going batty?”
The mare snorted and moved away, clearly disapproving of her little outburst.
“I ask for help when I need it,” Sabrina calmly replied. “That’s something you might think about.”
“I did ask for help with Jeannie,” Kathleen pointed out.
“I meant whenyouneed help, not when someone else does. You tend to go it alone, dearest. I think that’s because you don’t wish to appear vulnerable or not in control.”
“I always said you were the smartest person I know,” Kathleen ruefully replied.
Sabrina tilted her head. “Shall I hazard a guess as to your trouble right now?”
“That shouldn’t be difficult. After all, you told Grant where I was hiding.”
“Only because Angus was preparing to make you a proxy marriage proposal, since he was convinced that his grandson would make a hash of it. Grant had to threaten to lock him in his room to keep him from pestering you.”
Kathleen had to laugh. “That’s ridiculous, if rather sweet.”
“Angus wants you and Grant to be happy. Weallwant that.”
“I want that too, of course, but . . .” She sighed. “I worry that I’ll make a bungle of married life.”
“Grant clearly does not agree, dearest. He loves you just as you are.”
Kathleen thought of the expression in Grant’s eyes when he proposed to her. “I know,” she softly replied.
“But you still have doubts? That wouldn’t be unusual, even when you love a person.”
It was a surprising admission from her always-decisive cousin. “Did you have doubts about Graeme?”
“Not at all. He needed convincing, though.”
Kathleen covered her mouth, trying not to laugh.
Sabrina shook her head. “My poor lamb was so skittish that I had to storm his bedroom and attempt, rather clumsily, to seduce him.”
“Good God. How did that end up?”
Her cousin pointed back to the house. “Baby in nursery.”
“Huzzah for you, old girl. But as for me . . . well, I’ve done quite a good job of convincing myself that I’d never get married. It would just be me, my gardens, my horses . . .”
“And Ireland. Kathleen, you do not have to give up all your dreams. Just shift them a bit. I’m sure you could visit Ireland whenever you wished.”
