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I feel a tear slip free from my eye. Before another can fall, big warm arms are around me.

I don’t know exactly why, but I cry.

No, Isob.

Killian holds me, petting my hair and saying nothing as I bawl into his chest. The rock I didn’t know I needed.

I don’t know how long I stand there for, but eventually, the tears give way to sniffles and I step away to wipe my face. Killian says nothing, just watches as I wash my face. When I’m done, he holds out a hand and leads me over to the couch. We sit beside each other holding hands, something I’m not sure I’ve ever done like this.

“Better?” he asks after a moment. I nod and feel my cheeks heat.

“Sorry, I-I don’t know what happened.”

The corner of his mouth turns up. “We all need a moment sometimes.”

I’m grateful that we sit in silence after that. My mind races, war raging between my body, heart, and mind.

You’ve never really given yourself to someone. Take the leap. Jump.

I shift my body so I’m facing him.

“Kill, I—,” I stop, unable to get any words out. Fuck, I’m bad at this shit.

“That’s okay, I’m not great at it either. Just try.”

Oh. I said that aloud.

I consider my words.

“I like you, I do. And I’m grateful for your help. But I’m really not the kind of girl you hold on to. What you’re asking is, what, a relationship? Monogamy?” I let out a choked sound. “That isn’t me, Kill.”

His dark eyes gaze into mine, no judgement in them.

“Do you want me?”

I start a bit at the simple question, swallowing deeply. His hand squeezes mine, his face serious rather than soft.

“What if I fuck it up?”

“Do you wanna try?” he says, looking at me with intensity.

I look into his eyes.

“I know you’re scared, but look at who you are? What you’ve done? Is a badass like you really going to let a relationship scare you?” he continues. I feel the corner of my mouth turn up.

We haven’t known each other long, but the man certainly seems to get me.

“Okay,” I finally say, my voice quiet. “I’ll try.”

His responding grin is brilliant, and his lips find mine only a second later. What starts as persuasive quickly turns demanding as he urges my lips apart. Fear gives way to passion and I feel the uncertainty drain out of me as his hands roam my body.

“That means I get to give you more orgasms,” he mumbles into my mouth as a hand trails up my side to cup my breast. I smile against his lips but push back on his chest gently and laugh lightly.

As much as I want my orgasms, I think it’s time for me to take back control.

“I think you’ve befuddled me quite enough. It’s my turn,” I say with a wink. I don’t give him time to reply before I get on my knees in front of him, tugging my shirt over my head. Reaching for his belt, I look up at him from under my lashes.

I’ve seduced and fucked more people than I can count. I know all the tricks, the ways to drive a person wild, not just men either. With Killian, though, in this moment, it’s not about the game and the hustle. Not just, anyway.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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